Posted 7:14 PM by Gene

The one thing that pleases us about a supposed Triple-Crown candidate finishing last is the collective scream of all those millions of easily-hoodwinked sucker -- BETTORS tearing up their WIN tickets.

Another thing that pleases us is that the horse was named for UPS, which has had plenty of last-place moments in our reckoning.

Yet another thing that pleases us is that we won't have to listen to hundreds of thousands of news hacks gassing about HISTORY, including most who wouldn't have been there to see it.

Nothing against the horse, mind you. We're sure it's a fine horse and very lovable.

P. S. The only bad thing is that Jim McKay did the Triple Crown races, and he deserved better.

Posted 4:28 PM by Gene

Pity poor HAHVAHD MUTUAL FUND. Worth only $35 billion, churning out countless Connie-and-Clyde types to ruin the world, secure in its wisdom even as it plies more foolishness. The only answer to this manufactured crisis is for its clients to surrender still more of their earnings, and for us taxpayers to pile on more booty, and see the MUTUAL FUND grow bigger, stronger, richer and more irrelevant.

(Via Chronicle.com)

Posted 4:24 PM by Gene

"We all remember how SAG members turned out in numbers to picket, march and rally with us during our contract campaign and strike," the WGA said. "Now it’s our turn to be there for them."

And we'll be sure to show OUR solidarity for another nice long STRIKE!

Posted 4:13 PM by Gene

SPIKE is an overrated director; THE GREATEST ACTOR-TURNED-DIRECTOR OF ALL TIME is an overrated director. They both make ad-blurbist-pleasin' wuhks of AHT that entertain few. It behooves them both to SHUT THEIR FACES.

(Via Access Atlanta)

Posted 4:03 PM by Gene

"The federal budget is like a battleship, badly off course. We cannot steer it to balance overnight, but we are moving it in that direction, applying fiscal discipline, but not at the expense of the values and priorities that we as Democrats hold dear."

OH SHUT UP, Jack Spratt. Your values and priorities are no better than the Republicans', you'll waste our money on countless boondoggles, and you have your sugar daddies to treat too.

And of course you won't go down with the ship.

Posted 2:47 PM by Gene

Alexander P. Throttlebottom is at it again:

"It's not good for producing nations to see the U.S. struggling economically. They depend on us to be a significant engine in world economic activity," U.S. Energy Secretary Samuel Bodman said.

TRANSLATION: Please, pretty please, sheikhs, give us the oil. You don't want to see Uncle Sam die, do you? Please, PRETTY please, more oil!!!!!

Posted 12:09 PM by Gene

We are sorry to learn Jim McKay has died. He was the class of ABC Sports. Sports broadcasting has changed so much since his time (much for the worse, despite the high-tech bells and whistles -- or perhaps because of them) it's impossible to see him getting a job doing a local softball tournament these days. All the more the industry's loss.

Posted 6:31 PM by Gene

No wonder the stock market tanked today:

Amazon Just Lost $1.8 Million in an Hour

...The e-commerce site went down this afternoon around 1:30 EDT and stayed down for at least an hour. Attempts to access Amazon.com were met with the following message: "Http/1.1 Service Unavailable."

Come to think of it, if the DWIGHTDOMS and CRAMERTORIUMS shut down for a few days it might save us some money.

Posted 6:29 PM by Gene

I think we can tell who's going to see THE PROMO:

Study: 8% of U.S. Women Are Recession-Proof Shoppers

OR:

Seemingly, there is negligence when it comes to the price of trendy products. Eighty percent are willing to pay more for the latest fashions and 81% agree that "price is not the most important factor—it's getting just what I want." Also, 79% agree "there are times that I buy clothing without even looking at the price."

Posted 6:03 PM by Gene

Methinks con-SER-va-tives make too much of the Lord's résumé. Let us look at God's father Abraham: he served all of one term in the House and lost twice for the Senate (in the days before direct elections). Before his presidency he was the nineteenth century's idea of a high-powered trial lawyer, and given that his net worth was all of $15,000 he wasn't too high-powered. Henry Adams had said if he'd had to go by his one meeting with Lincoln to determine his presidency he'd have deemed him an outright failure. Or look at Harry Truman -- who could have predicted a busted haberdasher could be such a successful president? That said perhaps The Lord has it in Him to be good, but we fear He (and especially The Lord's Wife) may have too much self-contentment for that.

Posted 5:57 PM by Gene

Should the Drinking Age Be Lowered?



NO.

Enough infants drink as it is.

Posted 5:56 PM by Gene

A senior city buildings official took bribes in exchange for falsely reporting that cranes had been inspected and that crane operators had been certified, but his actions did not appear to be connected to two recent crane collapses that killed nine people, authorities said Friday.

Maybe not, but how often would we want to wager on that one?

Posted 5:55 PM by Gene

And remember, God:

Congressional action as a campaign tool can cut both ways.

Posted 5:47 PM by Gene

We wonder if this stat has elected The Messiah. Thus we offer a prediction: The Messiah does a MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. Oh it won't be a "Mission Accomplished" exactly, and His thousands of handlers won't be lunkheaded enough to put a banner on an aircraft carrier; instead when He wants us outoutOUT of Iraq He'll proclaim VICTORY. Be prepared to hear The Word from The Lord a thousand times -- VICTORY. One of the first things He'll do is get a photo op together with every Democratic general and admiral He can find (good luck, Lord) and wave that fifty-seven-star flag on His lapel. He'll proclaim VICTORY at His first State of the Union so often you'd think it's V-J Day all over. (Oops, mustn't say V-J; The Lord would consider that racistsexisthomophobic.) The Republicans, by now reduced to a third of the Congress, will shatter the aura of VICTORY with heckling and catcalls throughout His speech, which shouldn't dent the Era of Good Feelings, though it could have some impact on The Lord's Prophecy that He'll serve two terms.

Posted 5:45 PM by Gene

We wonder if the problem with commodities trading in general and oil trading in particular isn't that the system is broken but that it works too well.

Commodities indices have proved the most popular way for institutional investors to gain exposure to rising oil, metals and agriculture prices. As an asset class, they have comfortably out-performed returns on both stocks markets and bonds, helping attract huge new investor inflows.

1. How many of us are superwealthy? and 2. Doesn't it eventually crimp even the Richie Riches' style too?

Posted 5:59 PM by Gene

Here's the deal, Christina: you trade your looks for Ugly Betty's and we're sure people won't complain about your child rearing.

Although we'd sort of like you better without the infernal tattoo.

Posted 5:56 PM by Gene

Bank of America can now lose billions with impunity.

Posted 5:54 PM by Gene

Zagat takes itself off auction block

TRANSLATION: The outfit that plasters its ratings on anything and everything is increasingly worth what its ratings are worth.

Posted 5:51 PM by Gene

MS. TRAVERS:

Rush today, outlining the healthy conservative love for RWR:

Coulda fooled me, Petericia -- I thought it was an unhealthy obsessive past-fixation.

Posted 5:45 PM by Gene

Most Comcast Web service to top 100 Mbps by 2010

TRANSLATION:

Most Comcast bills to top $1000 a month by 2010

Posted 5:37 PM by Gene

And in more brilliant reporting:

Democratic Sen. Dianne Feinstein of California, who backed Clinton's bid to become the first woman president, said, "I have no doubt that if she comes back to the Senate -- as opposed to becoming the vice presidential nominee or whatever -- she will continue to be a tremendous senator."

"And that's not too shabby," Feinstein said.

I am certainly glad to learn that. I don't know WHAT we would do without AL REUT.

Well, I do know: make more fun of the ASSPress.

Posted 5:33 PM by Gene

DIMWITS AT THE MESS:

The last campaign

A look back at Robert F. Kennedy's dramatic run — and the tragic ending. [Home-page video link]

There's that good ol' 9/11 definition of "tragic" again. Anyone from Mars will be forgiven for thinking Kennedy contracted an instantly lethal form of cancer as he walked from the platform at the Ambassador Hotel, or suddenly melted into a pile of green goo. DAMMIT, HE WAS SHOT BY AN ARAB TERRORIST. What makes news hacks so averse to telling the truth?

Posted 5:17 PM by Gene

And speaking of irritating, at the top of the list is any story regarding JACK'S ALPHABET SOUP. Its toxic recipe will never change, which make such stories especially exasperating. Jack and the equally evil Louie Nizer invented it as a way of permanently putting one over the public. No amount of complaining will ever bring it down. Indeed that media bigwigs can give us the bird despite ever increasing contentment with their "product" means they've won the argument on every account, and even losing ratings and audiences and money means nothing; look at the press. The problem is exacerbated by the few groups that do complain apologetically, and get what they deserve -- a big fat egg on their faces. Certainly we have less than zero respect for the BBB's dead advertising review board, although dead is a compliment for those walking corpses.

And speaking of dough, we know what The Messiah will do: issue a few carefully and pretentiously molded thunder-strike sermons on violence, while creating a media money machine that will make Slick look like the Little Match Girl -- and pleasing the deep end with laws to make ISLAMOPHOBIA a capital offense. MORON.

(Via ArtsJournal)

Posted 5:13 PM by Gene

There must be some rocket science involved here. The leeches of the American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers are paying more for junk TV -- so they can lock in "lower rates"? I'd think when you're paying more you're not paying less, unless I'm missing something. Possibly I am -- any sign that our superiors burning our money have any sense.

That GE BANCORP has sold two SUPER BORE spots for $3 MILLION indeed indicates their megalomania is like a black hole, that sucks in all that is good while accreting a bigger hardened blob of insanities and denials.

Perhaps what these typists mean to say is that the ASWIA cretins are paying more now so they won't have to pay even more more later. Come on, guys -- it's only OUR money! GO FOR IT!

Posted 2:32 PM by Gene

UK and US officials attacked in Zimbabwe

And why should Robert worry? He knows we won't do anything.

Posted 2:30 PM by Gene

We wonder, however, if people in the Pentagon should have one -- especially when they're lugging nukes without authorization.

Posted 2:29 PM by Gene

If there's one thing a JUNTA, and especially the JUNTA FROM HELL, would hate is anyone with a sense of humor.

Posted 1:13 PM by Gene

An anchorpoop would plot to throw a fellow anchorpoop off the air?

Count us as ASTONISHED. Pfffffffffffffffffft!!!!!

Posted 12:23 PM by Gene

MSNBC pundit Keith Olbermann, who spotlights misbehavior nightly with his "Worst Person in the World" recognition, owes New York state for unpaid business taxes, according to a tax warrant notice.

We figure in time this will be a matter of dueling tax loopholes, and at any rate he and NO-SPIN SPIN SPIN etc. could finance quite a few Federal programs on what they don't pay.

Posted 12:13 PM by Gene

9/11 suspect seeks death

I think we should be VERY glad to oblige him.

Posted 12:09 PM by Gene

OooooOOOOOoooooh, The Messiah hurls a thunderbolt at Sen. Morals!

He should remember The Drunken Slob is thicker than water.

Posted 11:40 AM by Gene

MB2, who has not had to worry about driving himself for at least twenty years, is worried about GAS PRICES?

Posted 11:38 AM by Gene

Showtime pledges to 'United States'
Network greenlights Spielberg-backed series

When we saw this we thought LUKE was doing another PC history.

Posted 5:03 PM by Gene

Meanwhile the same WORRRRRULLLLD COMMUNITY that has let people starve in Burma/Myanmar and Zimbabwe LUHHHHVES the Lord, meaning He now has the Politically Correct Seal of Approval.

Posted 5:02 PM by Gene

The man who changed the money in The Messiah's temple is found guilty sixteen times!

No problem!

Posted 11:36 AM by Gene

We wonder if Honorary Gov -- Mayor Mike is serious, or if the just wants to hear the melodious tones of his own sweet voice a little while longer.

Posted 11:29 AM by Gene

And how does the Holy Change Agent say, "Read my lips -- new taxes"?

Posted 11:24 AM by Gene

Barack Obama should not pick Hillary Clinton as his vice-presidential nominee, former president Jimmy Carter has told the Guardian.

"I think it would be the worst mistake that could be made," said Carter. "That would just accumulate the negative aspects of both candidates."

Show your independence, Messiah -- PICK HILLARY!

Carter, who formally endorsed the Illinois senator last night, cited opinion polls showing 50% of US voters with a negative view of Clinton.

In terms that might discomfort the Obama camp, he said: "If you take that 50% who just don't want to vote for Clinton and add it to whatever element there might be who don't think Obama is white enough or old enough or experienced enough or because he's got a middle name that sounds Arab, you could have the worst of both worlds."

You sound fired up, Mr. Greatest Ex-Prez.

Posted 8:09 AM by Gene

The stunning magnitude of Hillary Clinton's embarrassing loss to a relative rookie, paired with her husband's bizarre and often sulfuric campaign rhetoric, have left both Democratic megastars somewhat smaller than life - even if Hillary Clinton ends up on the ticket with Barack Obama.

Did anyone emerge from this campaign slog unscathed? Do we regard any of the candidates with even the modicum of respect as before?

Or consider this line:

Although they each have some virtues, Obama and McCain are far from the best that America can do.

No, in an age of mediocrities, they are the best that America can do.

Posted 9:25 PM by Gene

Which raises another question our intrepid hacks haven't asked: Will the military kindly take to orders from a knee-jerk leftist, however sexy and sacred?

Posted 9:19 PM by Gene

If I had to guess as to what The Messiah's presidency will be like, I'd say what happened in Spain. Yes, Spain elected a CHICKEN, and yes, it went off the deep PC end on social issues, but even the CHICKEN couldn't not stop the housing biz from collapsing, or one of its neighborhoods from drying up.

Of course the one difference is God will get us outoutOUT of Iraq, which may mean we'll have to deal with nutty Arabs too.

Posted 9:09 PM by Gene

[E]xcitement about the Kindle, which was introduced in November, also worries some publishing executives, who fear Amazon’s still-growing power as a bookseller. Those executives note that Amazon currently sells most of its Kindle books to customers for a price well below what it pays publishers, and they anticipate that it will not be long before Amazon begins using the Kindle’s popularity as a lever to demand that publishers cut prices.

And what would be wrong with that?

While authors including William Shatner, Andre Dubus III and Ty Pennington drew big crowds of booksellers seeking autographs, several books by little-known authors scheduled for publication were being pushed hard by publishers. Those include two that use witches, of a sort, as their protagonists and one whose author is in shaman training.

I repeat, what would be wrong with that?

Posted 8:51 PM by Gene

Unlisted telephone numbers disclosed by Verizon
PSC to question company Thursday about mistake involving 12,500 customers

Yes, there's competition to be the cable industry.

Posted 8:22 PM by Gene

The actor Mel Ferrer has died, and his obit reminds us he was married to Audrey Hepburn, which reminds us there was a time when the movies did not have Adam Sandler.

Posted 8:19 PM by Gene

GM: Small Is the New Big

Meaning when GM's finally up to speed big will be the new small.

Posted 8:09 PM by Gene

Just as the networks paid idiotic sums to lure people to visions of denture adhesives, now their cable synergisms are doing the same thing, only having their stars open their big fat crackpot mouths because it's the only way to draw attention to shows that cannot draw audiences of more than a million.

We see where it got Lucy Van Pelt. And we see where it's getting the cable synergisms, which are now universally viewed as a cross between an aggressively unfunny joke and an electronic emetic.

Posted 8:06 PM by Gene

TRANSLATION: First Burma/Myanmar, now Zimbabwe, have turned THE WORRRULD COMMUNITY into an impotent victim of blackmail.

Posted 5:18 PM by Gene

Years and years ago our friends at PepsiCo had a brilliant idea: put three fast-food chains under one roof.

It doesn't seem like such a brilliant idea anymore.

We see in other KFC news that it has agreed to PETA's request for a more "humane" form of slaughtering. We hope this isn't just another big-biz affirmation of PC.

Posted 5:03 PM by Gene

Airlines May Start Treating Passengers `Like Freight'

We suspect many inveterate travelers will say, NO COMMENT.

Posted 1:52 PM by Gene

"He will declare victory tonight in a moment of HISSSSSSSSSSSSSTORRRRY," ABC News' chief Washington correspondent George Stephanopoulos told "Good Morning America." [Historic overemphasis added]

Wait a second shrimp, weren't you ALREADY a press secretary or something?

Posted 10:44 AM by Gene

More than savvy consumers and aggressive retailers did in eBay's auctions (assuming the past tense). What did them in was the inconvenience and pitfalls of auctioning: of having to place bids early and still not winning; of sniping; of being scammed; of sellers who'd only take checks; of PayPal's arbitrary spending limits. A thousand and one tiny problems merged into an insuperable one.

Posted 10:25 AM by Gene

Why would Paramount Pete trade in his powerful executive job for a blog?

Posted 10:21 AM by Gene

Oh will you SHUT UP, WORRRULLLLD COMMUNITY? You've already said you don't care.

Posted 9:55 PM by Gene

Congratulate yourselves again, DWIGHTS -- for upholding free speech in Russia!

Posted 9:29 PM by Gene

FedEx to drop Kinko's name, take $891M charge

When you absolutely, positively have to get rid of it overnight....

Do I smell the crisp aroma of money burning?

Only "$2 million a storefront"!

Posted 8:48 PM by Gene

`Entertainment Tonight' mum on Jolie twins snafu

So, You're saying NOT any publicity is good publicity -- SUMNER?!?!?

Posted 8:17 PM by Gene

And here is the ruby-red cherry atop this pile of -- whipped cream on the cake:

The upfront marketplace may be a tight one, but that isn't stopping networks from eking out moderate price increases for ad time on their air, according to media buyers.

Walt Disney's ABC has been able to secure increases of around 9% in the cost of reaching 1,000 viewers, according to people familiar with the situation. That measure, also known as a CPM, is commonly used in these types of negotiations. If ABC can secure high-single-digit percentage price increases, that would suggest that Fox, which has more momentum than any of its broadcast rivals this year, ought to be able to get even more. Fox declined to comment.

You mean you couldn't transcribe the dollar signs in their eyes?

Posted 7:58 PM by Gene

In light of SUMNER's latest stunt we may run a daily feature on how IDIOT ADVERTISERS suck up to His net. Here's an example from the numerical dolts of Nielsen from last month:

The top 10 cable programs that featured product placements accounted for 59,308 occurrences in the first quarter of 2008-an increase of 16% from 50,940 during the first quarter of 2007. "American Chopper" on TLC was again the top program, with 16,164 placements. Half of the programs in the Top 10 air on MTV, and another three air on BRAVO....

Four of the top five cable programs with the most apparel placements air on MTV.

AND THIS we must post in full, though it comes close to getting us to boycotting PEPSICO:

Doritos and MTV Reality Dating Series 'When Spicy Meets Sweet' Finale Now Up to Fans

Viewer Votes to Determine Which Spicy-Sweet Couple Will Star in New Doritos
Spicy Sweet Chili Tortilla Chip National Television Commercial

NEW YORK, May 2 /PRNewswire/ -- Today, fans will have their say when they tune in to watch two remaining spicy-sweet couples compete in a series of challenges in "When Spicy Meets Sweet" -- a short-form reality dating series developed by the Doritos brand and MTV. Viewer votes will determine which spicy-sweet pair will star in a national commercial for new Doritos Spicy Sweet Chili tortilla chips that will air exclusively on MTV and MTV2 this summer.

The micro-series finale premieres today on MTV between 2pm -- 5pm ET/PT during MTV's afternoon programming block, dubbed "Spicy Sweet Fridays." Following the on-air premiere, viewers can vote online at http://www.snackstrongproductions.com to cast their vote through May 8th.

The 18-episode reality-dating series began airing on April 18th when fans saw what happened as spicy girls and sweet guys were matched up to go on dates. Throughout the short-form series, cast members took on some of the most unpredictable dating experiences of their lives, all captured on film and watched by millions. Viewers saw their chosen sweet guys go on spicy dates such as a trip to the tattoo and piercing parlor, while their chosen spicy girls explored their sweeter side on dates such as volunteering at a senior citizens center. Fans who may have missed the
original airings on MTV television can still view each episode, along with extra footage, at http://www.snackstrongproductions.com.

"Upon launching our new Doritos Spicy Sweet Chili chips we wanted to put control back into the hands of our consumers so they could not only compete for the opportunity to star in our national commercial, but also determine who those stars would be," said Ann Mukherjee, group vice president, marketing, Frito-Lay North America. "As we considered how great spicy and sweet could be together, we thought, what better stage than MTV to ask, 'do opposites really attract?'"

Tim Rosta, Senior Vice President of Integrated Marketing for MTV noted that the campaign is a shining example of what can happen when MTV partners with its clients to create and produce creative, authentic and engaging branded entertainment.

"The idea for a reality dating show that runs in commercial time was born out of MTV's already successful on-air programs and Doritos desire to bring their new flavorful chip literally to life," he explained. "Our collaboration with Doritos is a perfect example of how to engage targeted consumers through innovative brand programs that put control of the brand in consumers hands."

In February, Doritos and MTV invited fans across the country to submit their profile on Doritos' website http://www.snackstrongproductions.com for a chance to be cast on the new reality dating series. To support this first-of-its-kind, multi-media program, MTV re-branded its popular web site
http://www.nextornot.com as http://www.spicyandsweet.nextornot.com to serve as an interactive community for hopefuls to submit their profiles. Between February 25 and March 16, online viewers helped to determine the four spicy girls and four sweet guys to be cast in the show by the amount of time spent on their favorite profiles. The web site has garnered more than 19 million page views, with users averaging more than 30 minutes on the site per visit.

"When Spicy Meets Sweet" is the evolution of the Doritos brand allowing consumers to be in control. Last year, the Doritos brand aired two consumer-created commercials during Super Bowl XLI as part of the first Doritos "Crash the Super Bowl" challenge. Following Doritos "Crash the Super Bowl," the brand launched the Doritos "Fight for the Flavor" campaign to invite Doritos fans to determine which of two new flavors survived on store shelves and which one was pulled. Then, the brand launched the Doritos "X-13D Flavor Experiment," where consumers had a chance to name the new mysterious flavor of Doritos tortilla chips, followed by "Unlock Xbox," which empowered fans to design the first-ever consumer-created Xbox LIVE(R) Arcade game. Most recently, Doritos launched the music career of one of its talented fans by airing her original song as a music video during its Super Bowl XLII air time as part of its second annual "Crash the Super Bowl" program.

MTV is the dynamic, vibrant experiment at the intersection of music, creativity and youth culture. For over 26 years, MTV has evolved, challenged the norm, and detonated boundaries -- giving each new generation a creative outlet and voice that entertains, informs and unites on every platform and screen. On-air, MTV has been the number one rated 24 hour ad-supported cable network P12-24 for 16 straight years. Online, MTV.com scored double-digit growth in 2007 and MTV launched 15 dynamic online communities and eight new virtual worlds. On the go, MTV Mobile is the #1 music brand in the wireless space -- delivering 90% more streams than in 2006. And MTV's successful sibling networks MTV2, mtvU and MTV Tr3s each deliver unprecedented customized content, super-serving music fans, college students and young American Latinos like no one else. MTV is part of MTV Networks, a unit of

Viacom (NYSE: VIA, VIA.B), one of the world's leading creators of programming and content across all media platforms. Wanna know more? Come on in... http://www.mtvpress.com.

Frito-Lay North America is the $10 billion convenient foods division of PepsiCo, which is headquartered in Purchase, NY. In addition to Frito-Lay, PepsiCo divisions include Pepsi-Cola, Quaker Foods, Gatorade and Tropicana.

SOURCE MTV

PERMALINK!!!!!

Posted 7:46 PM by Gene

SUMNER, up to His old tricks again.

Here's betting the weed stunt and the camera-pullback stunt were preceded by an ad from MOON 'N' STARS, and followed by an ad for -- COKE.

HALF RIGHT.

Posted 7:28 PM by Gene

One of the most overreported fires in American history was an industrial accident.

Had this happened in Podunk, at a ten-block square former mattress factory, we would not have heard of it. Had this been a garden-variety industrial accident that killed several people, we'd have heard a little of it. We'd guess -- to take one example -- the terrible conflagration at BP in Texas City several years back got less attention. That this was such an obsession (and I'll confess I followed it too) shows there is no stronger feeling among news hacks than self-love, and in Hollywood they see their eternal glory in a mirror, which they do not know is from a fun house.

Posted 7:23 PM by Gene

Todd Purdum has given us a definitive reason why Hillary should not be president: it's the man who shares her married name.

Who meekly accepts criticism. (Updated at 10:05 p.m.)

Posted 6:07 PM by Gene

Bloomberg Celebrates the Internet

How? By taxing it? Pffffffffffffffffffft!

Posted 6:02 PM by Gene

We were happy to see the Nine Fingers -- "without comment" -- denied Zelig Selig a chance to REALLY grab the fans by the ankles and vigorously shake them. Demanding that athletes' names are private property is total nonsense, but we expect nonsense from the sport that gave us the asterisk men.

Then again, given the looniness of the rotisserie leaguers' desire to fry their brains, it might have led to a few happier marriages. Then again, aren't those mercenaries obscenely wealthy enough?

Posted 5:55 PM by Gene

PEOPLE WARNER CABLE is still sniffing at download caps. We're not entirely sure why now that it's breaking off from the mother ship, and thus has less reason to protect its former parent's excursions into very bad taste. We wonder too if it's counterproductive. Remember when you were limited to 1 meg on Yahoo! Mail? There will be ways around download caps, legal and illegal. Best to work on legal ones.

Posted 5:52 PM by Gene

Why am I thinking that, despite the best efforts of the Windy City to screw up the case, R. is guilty as charged?

Posted 5:48 PM by Gene

Apparently our man Boobs delivered a stemwinder at AIPAC, which caused The Messiah's disciples to frown. If Boobs can make Mess's appeasement the focus of his campaign, he wins. If not, he loses.

On the other hand, Rep. Schiff has an interesting question:

1) [H]ow will his foreign policy be different from George Bush’s, and 2) if it is not different, why should anyone expect better results than Bush has achieved?

Although we might more productively ask how a Messiah administration would differ from Dubya's.

Posted 5:46 PM by Gene

It is somehow apt that a former part of The Empire is buying Jaguar and Land Rover; it's a shame though, that one of our empires had to cede it.

Posted 5:43 PM by Gene

Hasn't the time come to end the Orbiting Jalopy's plumbing missions?

(Via Slashdot)

Posted 8:47 AM by Gene

Speaking of CEOs, don't you just hate it when CEOs for BIG companies who make BIG mistakes get fired?

Pfffffffffffffffffffffffft!!!!!

Posted 8:46 AM by Gene

The Three-Headed Dog has chewed up and spit out at least half its stake in Chrysler, suggesting it had buyer's remorse when it cut the deal.

Posted 8:45 AM by Gene

Because Islamists throw tantrums with suicide bombers, the world shrinks.

Posted 5:56 PM by Gene

If it's Sunday, it must be Big-Double-A-Scribble Time:

1. Boy I'd love to be an auto dealer these days:

What's more, according to PIN, four out of 10 trade-ins on large pickups in the first 26 days of May were what the industry calls "upside down," where the owner of the vehicle still owes more on it than the retailer will offer for it. There are even dealers refusing to accept big SUVs on trade-ins, an occurrence Mr. Toprak said he's never heard of before. "They don't want to take the risk since they don't know how low values will go," he said.

You can bet they'll go pretty low. Incentives are climbing to near-record levels and roughly averaged $2,400 per unit at the end of May, Mr. Toprak said. The deals are more generous on gas-guzzling SUVs, around $4,500, with some big pickups nearing $8,000 per unit.

Those of us who sneered at the idiots who bought Hummers and other petroleum incinerators are getting the last laugh.

2. MICKEY D's franchisees are up in arms because the dollar menu is feasting on their profits. The MICK is in a bind. It never occurred to Ronny that lots of people would buy solely from the dollar menu in bad times; but it can't take the menu down now because people are clearly in no mood to trade up. DWIGHTS don't help with their psychotic work on food and fuel prices. It would seem the $1.09 Menu is inevitable.

3. Well, if Bud's sold to a Belgian outfit run by Brazilians, there's always soccer.

The one good thing is that InBev sounds like a company that doesn't spend AS MUCH on junk TV, meaning all those prima donnas may have to go elsewhere for their skin graffiti.

Posted 9:40 AM by Gene

If the SAM LITTLE of HOLLYWOOD is correct THE PROMO had the equivalent of a one-night stand.

(Via the MANIACS of HSX)

Posted 9:32 AM by Gene

The Messiah obviously believes churches are fungible.

Posted 9:22 AM by Gene

You don't suppose "performance art" is one reason we've learned to live without the prima donnas of professional basketball? Naaaaaaaaaaaah.

And that is the same rag that's been making a thing lately about tattoos on buildings and buses, again proving news hacks can have it as many ways as they like.

Posted 9:17 AM by Gene

Seven pages on how the Golfing Machine is "IMMORTAL"; an "acclaimed" novelist raving a novel; now all we need is another young blogger to embarrass and The Paper of Re-CORD will be complete.