THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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Saturday, September 16, 2006
Though some might regard his remarks as crass, Robert Hughes is not wrong to think the WTC was ugly, nor that the buildings to replace it may be ugly in a different way.
"[W]e face here in New York a poverty of ideas for commemorative art and architecture.”
And elsewhere in the culture, which is why the WTC's replacements will stink.
"[W]e face here in New York a poverty of ideas for commemorative art and architecture.”
And elsewhere in the culture, which is why the WTC's replacements will stink.
The furore over the Pope's remarks about Islam has left many Catholics inside and outside the Vatican shaking their heads in disbelief.
TRANSLATION: THE POPE CAN'T SAY ANYTHING WITHOUT THE PRESS'S PERMISSION!!!!!
If the Pope gives in to the news-hack/MODERATE alliance that grievously damages his pontificate -- and we suspect he knows it.
TRANSLATION: THE POPE CAN'T SAY ANYTHING WITHOUT THE PRESS'S PERMISSION!!!!!
If the Pope gives in to the news-hack/MODERATE alliance that grievously damages his pontificate -- and we suspect he knows it.
More MODERATE behavior:
Henry Paulson, who left Goldman Sachs Group Inc. in May to become the U.S. Treasury Secretary, said he was surprised to learn the extent to which Iranian front companies had infiltrated the financial system, prompting him to organize an ``education'' program for banks and governments.
How do you educate these people in competence?
Henry Paulson, who left Goldman Sachs Group Inc. in May to become the U.S. Treasury Secretary, said he was surprised to learn the extent to which Iranian front companies had infiltrated the financial system, prompting him to organize an ``education'' program for banks and governments.
How do you educate these people in competence?
Excellent: another double-digit down weekend's possible for the fillum biz! Where's all that talk of a comeback now?
Status.blogger.com has posts from people named Prashant, Pal, Pete and Graham, so they must be bringing newer, younger interns.
A small percentage of blogs will be down (both viewing and publishing) between 4:10pm and 4:20pm (PDT) as a part of clearing out today morning's blogspot issue.
We sincerely apologize for the downtown and will send updates as we have more information available.
Who knew infants knew code?
A small percentage of blogs will be down (both viewing and publishing) between 4:10pm and 4:20pm (PDT) as a part of clearing out today morning's blogspot issue.
We sincerely apologize for the downtown and will send updates as we have more information available.
Who knew infants knew code?
Richard Serra eructs:
"Public sculpture used to have a code," says the San Francisco native, who acquired his early metalworking experience during a stint in a steel factory. "There was a given iconography written into the way we worshiped our heroes. Public sculpture had to do with the depiction of a historical time or event."
Then metalworkers like you came along and erected artistic scrap-metal heaps in public places.
(Via the usual annoying ArtsJournal.com)
"Public sculpture used to have a code," says the San Francisco native, who acquired his early metalworking experience during a stint in a steel factory. "There was a given iconography written into the way we worshiped our heroes. Public sculpture had to do with the depiction of a historical time or event."
Then metalworkers like you came along and erected artistic scrap-metal heaps in public places.
(Via the usual annoying ArtsJournal.com)
More MODERATE behavior:
ONE woman who will not be getting married is Yusra al-Azzam, murdered by self- appointed Hamas religious police for the crime of picnicking on the beach with a man who turned out to be her fiancé.
The 20-year-old was killed in Gaza in April last year after a car full of thugs tried to pull over her vehicle after it left the seashore, and opened fire when it refused to stop.
The killers eventually caught up with her car, beating Ms al-Azzam’s fiancé and his brother. They were later arrested.
Hamas initially denied involvement, but then admitted that the gunmen were members. It quickly disavowed the killing, saying that the gunmen had acted individually.
Honour crimes are common but such random killings are rare, and the death generated much negative publicity.
However, the killers were related to a powerful Gaza clan and were soon released.
ONE woman who will not be getting married is Yusra al-Azzam, murdered by self- appointed Hamas religious police for the crime of picnicking on the beach with a man who turned out to be her fiancé.
The 20-year-old was killed in Gaza in April last year after a car full of thugs tried to pull over her vehicle after it left the seashore, and opened fire when it refused to stop.
The killers eventually caught up with her car, beating Ms al-Azzam’s fiancé and his brother. They were later arrested.
Hamas initially denied involvement, but then admitted that the gunmen were members. It quickly disavowed the killing, saying that the gunmen had acted individually.
Honour crimes are common but such random killings are rare, and the death generated much negative publicity.
However, the killers were related to a powerful Gaza clan and were soon released.
I am resigned to G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER not working on Election Day. Would Larry and Sergey's greed scheme be at $80 million a share if some of these sales -- ANALYSTS and idiot investors BLOGGED through the company of their dreams?
G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER'S WORKING AGAIN! We open at $800 on Monday!
The weenies of PUBLIC NEWSTALK RADIO are banging their heads against their effete walls because their audience is declining -- and people can't stand pledge breaks.
There are three simple solutions: 1. GO ALL NEWSTALK; 2. HIRE A LEFT-WING PILLHEAD; and 3. RUN COMMERCIALS. That seems to be where you're headed anyway.
There are three simple solutions: 1. GO ALL NEWSTALK; 2. HIRE A LEFT-WING PILLHEAD; and 3. RUN COMMERCIALS. That seems to be where you're headed anyway.
We are sorry to see DOW 36,000 has taken over The American Enterprise and intends to turn it into something called The American that will "focus" on "business, economics and public affairs" -- in short, a carbon copy of Forbes.
Does the world really need another slick GLIBERTARIAN biz rag?
Does the world really need another slick GLIBERTARIAN biz rag?
The Pope expresses "regrets", as well he should, but if he is a man -- and we have no men among world leaders these days -- he will say that extremists of any character should not hijack ANY religion. But the news hacks and "MODERATES" will be on his back, so we can expect a complete and abject giving in...unless the Pope is a MAN.
Meantime the peripatetic Arab stringers of the ASSociated Press inform us some "MODERATES" have firebombed two churches on the West Bank, meaning some kinds of moderation are okay.
Time for a new definition in THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY.
Meantime the peripatetic Arab stringers of the ASSociated Press inform us some "MODERATES" have firebombed two churches on the West Bank, meaning some kinds of moderation are okay.
Time for a new definition in THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY.
Friday, September 15, 2006
In more media megalomania:
The Los Angeles Times's corporate parent, The Tribune Company, is demanding job cuts in the newsroom, but editor Dean P. Baquet has said he will not comply with the demand.
I'D RATHER BE RI -- I'D RATHER REPORT THE TRUTH!
The Los Angeles Times's corporate parent, The Tribune Company, is demanding job cuts in the newsroom, but editor Dean P. Baquet has said he will not comply with the demand.
I'D RATHER BE RI -- I'D RATHER REPORT THE TRUTH!
We should have commented on this yesterday: recalling how Terry Teachout got agitated by some mendacious TWXSTER flack it seems Richard "Can't Anyone Here Play This Game?" Stengel does said flack one better -- LOTS better:
September 14, 2006
To: Time Inc. Employees
From: Richard Stengel
Re: Staff Announcement
TIME.com has experienced a renaissance under the editorial leadership of Steve Koepp. Within the last year, the site has doubled its unique users and increased the time spent per user by more than 50%. TIME.com has launched blogs (with more on the way), harnessed the fine work of TIME's correspondents, created a powerful partnership with CNN.com, and is rapidly evolving into a 24/7 news organization. Now that we are changing our publication date and rethinking how we put out the magazine, I have asked Steve to come back to the magazine to help think through those changes. During Steve's tenure at TIME, he has excelled in all the important roles he has undertaken, and few know the DNA of TIME better than he does. We will also take advantage of his great experience and sharp insight by having him oversee our most important franchise, "Person of the Year," and some of our other annuities.
I am delighted to announce that Josh Tyrangiel will be taking over as the new editor of TIME.com and will become an assistant managing editor at TIME. Josh will be charged with taking TIME.com to still greater heights, further integrating it with the magazine, and making it a must-visit daily news site for our unique blend of breaking news and fresh analysis. In addition to writing and editing national and international cover stories, Josh has been TIME's music critic for the past five years and has proven himself a high-energy journalist who brings tremendous intelligence to his coverage of the arts and culture. Before coming to TIME, Josh worked at Vibe and Rolling Stone magazines, produced the news at MTV and received a master’s degree in American Studies from Yale University.
Please join me in congratulating both of these talented editors on their important new assignments.
R. S.
We understand why Casey's namesake (we suspect Casey did a lot better job running a baseball team than his namesake does running a newsrag) might refer to pieces of dog leavings like "The PEOPLE NEWSRAG 100" as annuities -- the better to shake the readers down by the ankles. Alas, the news that this rag might cut its circ by a quarter makes one wonder if a fly-by-night insurance salesman sold them something. As for ER, he has already shown himself a FIRST-RATE ASS -- ER, SALESMAN himself. I guess this means while writing still more cover ads ER is going to turn PEOPLE NEWSRAG's Web site into a Stale.com imitation (though he could hardly touch MR. MELLERDRAMMER, already one of the Web's greatest self-parodies).
Good luck guys! Ha ha ha!
OR:
The new kind of spin that enrages me is a different proposition altogether. It’s not unconscious: it’s wholly knowing, a deliberate attempt to use speech not for the purposes of communication but for the purposes of manipulation, to corrupt the whole process of human interaction by making no statement that is not agenda-driven. It’s as if our culture had been taken over by lawyers—which, of course, it has. For modern spin is not so much pol-speak as lawyer-speak, with a dollop of Madison Avenue stirred in for bad measure. It’s half Safety First (never admit anything, however insignificant, that could possibly be used against you in court) and half salesmanship (never pass up a chance, however gratuitous, to plug the product). When I hear official spokesmen emitting phrases like the ones I quoted above, I feel not as if I were watching a marionette, but as if they were trying to make me a marionette.
September 14, 2006
To: Time Inc. Employees
From: Richard Stengel
Re: Staff Announcement
TIME.com has experienced a renaissance under the editorial leadership of Steve Koepp. Within the last year, the site has doubled its unique users and increased the time spent per user by more than 50%. TIME.com has launched blogs (with more on the way), harnessed the fine work of TIME's correspondents, created a powerful partnership with CNN.com, and is rapidly evolving into a 24/7 news organization. Now that we are changing our publication date and rethinking how we put out the magazine, I have asked Steve to come back to the magazine to help think through those changes. During Steve's tenure at TIME, he has excelled in all the important roles he has undertaken, and few know the DNA of TIME better than he does. We will also take advantage of his great experience and sharp insight by having him oversee our most important franchise, "Person of the Year," and some of our other annuities.
I am delighted to announce that Josh Tyrangiel will be taking over as the new editor of TIME.com and will become an assistant managing editor at TIME. Josh will be charged with taking TIME.com to still greater heights, further integrating it with the magazine, and making it a must-visit daily news site for our unique blend of breaking news and fresh analysis. In addition to writing and editing national and international cover stories, Josh has been TIME's music critic for the past five years and has proven himself a high-energy journalist who brings tremendous intelligence to his coverage of the arts and culture. Before coming to TIME, Josh worked at Vibe and Rolling Stone magazines, produced the news at MTV and received a master’s degree in American Studies from Yale University.
Please join me in congratulating both of these talented editors on their important new assignments.
R. S.
We understand why Casey's namesake (we suspect Casey did a lot better job running a baseball team than his namesake does running a newsrag) might refer to pieces of dog leavings like "The PEOPLE NEWSRAG 100" as annuities -- the better to shake the readers down by the ankles. Alas, the news that this rag might cut its circ by a quarter makes one wonder if a fly-by-night insurance salesman sold them something. As for ER, he has already shown himself a FIRST-RATE ASS -- ER, SALESMAN himself. I guess this means while writing still more cover ads ER is going to turn PEOPLE NEWSRAG's Web site into a Stale.com imitation (though he could hardly touch MR. MELLERDRAMMER, already one of the Web's greatest self-parodies).
Good luck guys! Ha ha ha!
OR:
The new kind of spin that enrages me is a different proposition altogether. It’s not unconscious: it’s wholly knowing, a deliberate attempt to use speech not for the purposes of communication but for the purposes of manipulation, to corrupt the whole process of human interaction by making no statement that is not agenda-driven. It’s as if our culture had been taken over by lawyers—which, of course, it has. For modern spin is not so much pol-speak as lawyer-speak, with a dollop of Madison Avenue stirred in for bad measure. It’s half Safety First (never admit anything, however insignificant, that could possibly be used against you in court) and half salesmanship (never pass up a chance, however gratuitous, to plug the product). When I hear official spokesmen emitting phrases like the ones I quoted above, I feel not as if I were watching a marionette, but as if they were trying to make me a marionette.
Another area where America has its collective ostrich head in the sand -- youth violence.
Are kids so wired and pop-cultured as to take away their inhibitions for such crime?
(Via USAOkay!!!!!.com)
Are kids so wired and pop-cultured as to take away their inhibitions for such crime?
(Via USAOkay!!!!!.com)
JERNALISTIC JUNQUE:
People who consume alcohol earn significantly more at their jobs than non-drinkers, according to a US study that highlighted "social capital" gained from drinking....
The authors acknowledged their study, funded by the Reason Foundation [GRRRRRR], a libertarian think tank, contradicted research released in 2000 by the Harvard School of Public Health.
"We created our hypothesis through casual observation and examination of scholarly accounts," the authors said.
TRANSLATION: We wrote this during happy hour.
People who consume alcohol earn significantly more at their jobs than non-drinkers, according to a US study that highlighted "social capital" gained from drinking....
The authors acknowledged their study, funded by the Reason Foundation [GRRRRRR], a libertarian think tank, contradicted research released in 2000 by the Harvard School of Public Health.
"We created our hypothesis through casual observation and examination of scholarly accounts," the authors said.
TRANSLATION: We wrote this during happy hour.
The CLATCH's Miami outlet blasts Radio and TV Marti -- and denies self-interest has anything to do with it:
Finally, to the speculation that these newspapers' new corporate owner is pulling the strings, ostensibly to pave the way for a bureau in Cuba: Not true. Howard Weaver, McClatchy vice president for news, said the company has no such plans:
``We have no plans to do so. We have not authorized any such approach on our behalf by any other parties. Any speculation or assertion to the contrary is simply wrong.''
CNN in Iraq might have said the same thing.
(Via the inevitable Romy)
Finally, to the speculation that these newspapers' new corporate owner is pulling the strings, ostensibly to pave the way for a bureau in Cuba: Not true. Howard Weaver, McClatchy vice president for news, said the company has no such plans:
``We have no plans to do so. We have not authorized any such approach on our behalf by any other parties. Any speculation or assertion to the contrary is simply wrong.''
CNN in Iraq might have said the same thing.
(Via the inevitable Romy)
So! Leftist bloggers LUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHVE Slick -- just as THE BLOGGERS OF THE MILLENNIUM LUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHVE Dubya.
There's a suck-up born every minute.
(Via the usual Corner)
There's a suck-up born every minute.
(Via the usual Corner)
It is somehow appropriate that the death of the firebrand Oriana Fallaci should have coincided with the POPE'S EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL remarks about Islam.
Now of course will be a great time for news hacks and thugs like Hosni and The Ophthalmologist to stir up riots. We have no doubt the Pope will abjectly apologize, and the hacks will smile the malevolent smile of the time when they issued bold, courageous remarks like,
CNN is not showing the negative caricatures of the likeness of the Prophet Mohammed because the network believes its role is to cover the events surrounding the publication of the cartoons while not unnecessarily adding fuel to the controversy itself.
People are paying a price for condemning Islamic fanatics. Who would have imagined this five years ago? Will we continue to pay it? Or will we stand up against the forces of tyranny?
Critics, such as Aiman Mazyek, head of the Central Council of Muslims in Germany, offered a litany of brutalities in Christianity's history, saying Catholicism too has a bloodstained past.
Agreed. So how do you explain your bloodstained present?
I guess this is going to last for weeks. It almost pays not to follow the news.
Now of course will be a great time for news hacks and thugs like Hosni and The Ophthalmologist to stir up riots. We have no doubt the Pope will abjectly apologize, and the hacks will smile the malevolent smile of the time when they issued bold, courageous remarks like,
CNN is not showing the negative caricatures of the likeness of the Prophet Mohammed because the network believes its role is to cover the events surrounding the publication of the cartoons while not unnecessarily adding fuel to the controversy itself.
People are paying a price for condemning Islamic fanatics. Who would have imagined this five years ago? Will we continue to pay it? Or will we stand up against the forces of tyranny?
Critics, such as Aiman Mazyek, head of the Central Council of Muslims in Germany, offered a litany of brutalities in Christianity's history, saying Catholicism too has a bloodstained past.
Agreed. So how do you explain your bloodstained present?
I guess this is going to last for weeks. It almost pays not to follow the news.
WOW!!!!! Yahoo! reports NEWS! (Instead of BEING it, for once.) It says Reggie Bush had his big fat running back hands in the cookie jar!
Leaving aside whether Reg should have taken the money, the temptations are very great, especially for families who've hardly known a dime in their lives. These guys are playing for future money, not the education; that much is often too obvious. Let's just quit the "amateur" charade and end indentured servitude in professional college sport.
Leaving aside whether Reg should have taken the money, the temptations are very great, especially for families who've hardly known a dime in their lives. These guys are playing for future money, not the education; that much is often too obvious. Let's just quit the "amateur" charade and end indentured servitude in professional college sport.
DWA traveling way back with 'Mr. Peabody'
As in Sherman. As in Rocky and Bullwinkle. THE CONSPIRACY is scraping the bottom of the barrel now. We think if it really wants to make a masterpiece it should be LIVE ACTION -- like other movies based on cartoons. That was our first thought when we saw this. Instead this is another argument that there are too many animated features. With any luck it will be a SUPERMAGNET for product placements.
Somebody seems to have forgotten Rocky and Bullwinkle BOMBED when THEY hit the big screen.
As in Sherman. As in Rocky and Bullwinkle. THE CONSPIRACY is scraping the bottom of the barrel now. We think if it really wants to make a masterpiece it should be LIVE ACTION -- like other movies based on cartoons. That was our first thought when we saw this. Instead this is another argument that there are too many animated features. With any luck it will be a SUPERMAGNET for product placements.
Somebody seems to have forgotten Rocky and Bullwinkle BOMBED when THEY hit the big screen.
Surprise: Congresspoop Ney will plead guilty. He does, however, have an excuse: alcohol. It was alcohol that got him in bed with the RED-STATE SCORPION. It was alcohol, apparently, that caused him to lose whatever scruples he had, and do business merely for himself, and not the people.
And so many Republicans don't understand why people are mad at them.
P. S. Who else?
And so many Republicans don't understand why people are mad at them.
P. S. Who else?
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Clooney, Nobel winner [SIC!] demand Darfur action
And if I can't stop the killing, NOBODY can!
Note the URL. Are the TWXSTERS dense or what?
Here's predicting Bugmeister's weirdly named iPod flops because it will be ALL about DRM and limiting choice. He'd be better off throwing the part of His fortune His company's wasting in the street.
I don't think I'd want to be a clerk or intern for the many HSBC execs who'll be spending next Monday unable to scream at them, "I SAW TIGER WIN THE WORLD'S MATCH PLAY CHAMPIONSHIP AND YOU DIDN'T!!!!!"
Still, they WILL be screaming, all right.
Still, they WILL be screaming, all right.
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOhoooooooooooooooooooo, ANYBODY OUT THERE?
And speaking of global wamring (it's still up), somebody named Iain Murray has the perfect title for a Corner post:
WHERE'S THAT DEAD HORSE?
WHERE'S THAT DEAD HORSE?
OooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooh:
DANGEROUS Comment from POPE: Islam Preaches -- VIOLENCE!!!!! [Overemphasis added]
We will hold our peace on the dangerous comments Islamists have made in the last few years -- most without words.
This is from something called Zaman Online, allegedly the "first Turkish paper on the Internet." Why can't the leading American news organizations put out the same bluster? At least we'd know what they're not thinking.
DANGEROUS Comment from POPE: Islam Preaches -- VIOLENCE!!!!! [Overemphasis added]
We will hold our peace on the dangerous comments Islamists have made in the last few years -- most without words.
This is from something called Zaman Online, allegedly the "first Turkish paper on the Internet." Why can't the leading American news organizations put out the same bluster? At least we'd know what they're not thinking.
And speaking of con-SER-va-tives, KLO's MAD:
RALLYING AMERICANS TO A WAR...ON GLOBAL WAMRING...
This will happen when movie reviewers like MS. TRAVERS heat up.
RALLYING AMERICANS TO A WAR...ON GLOBAL WAMRING...
This will happen when movie reviewers like MS. TRAVERS heat up.
When the founder of "FAIR" endorses something, we can be sure he is as reinforced-concrete-skulled as when the CORNER endorses CON-SER-VA-TIVE MOVIES.
Cohen describes cable news’s flaws as “a drunken exuberance for sex, crime and celebrity stories, matched by a grim timidity and fear of offending the powers-that-be — especially if the powers-that-be are CONSERVATIVES.” [Overemphasis added]
Like the TWXSTERS -- or RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
(Via the usual Romy. Stop shaking your head in agreement, Romy! We can hear it all the way up here!)
Cohen describes cable news’s flaws as “a drunken exuberance for sex, crime and celebrity stories, matched by a grim timidity and fear of offending the powers-that-be — especially if the powers-that-be are CONSERVATIVES.” [Overemphasis added]
Like the TWXSTERS -- or RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
(Via the usual Romy. Stop shaking your head in agreement, Romy! We can hear it all the way up here!)
Google Ad of the Week?
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this is a test creative
we will delete this once the video is in the system
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Common sense prevails in mu-ni-ci-pal government, for once: the City of the Big Shoulders will get its Wal-Marts.
Not that I associate Wal-Mart with common sense, but now some inner-city residents will have a little more choice than corner variety stores.
Not that I associate Wal-Mart with common sense, but now some inner-city residents will have a little more choice than corner variety stores.
I, King Denny, have made America safe from terrorism!
We're waiting for Speaker Babs to prove she'll be different in degree, not kind -- and it will be very little degree.
We're waiting for Speaker Babs to prove she'll be different in degree, not kind -- and it will be very little degree.
Do-it-yourself ads will move from Web promotions to the biggest stage in advertising with the airing of the first homemade commercial in a Super Bowl.
Frito-Lay on Thursday will invite consumers to enter their own 30-second ads for Doritos in an online competition, with the winner broadcast during the Feb. 4 NFL championship on CBS.
The eager Neuharthians plug the ads early this year!
Frito-Lay on Thursday will invite consumers to enter their own 30-second ads for Doritos in an online competition, with the winner broadcast during the Feb. 4 NFL championship on CBS.
The eager Neuharthians plug the ads early this year!
Voters across the nation are prepared to embrace an independent presidential candidate in 2008 — and Mayor Bloomberg is perfectly positioned for a White House run, according to a New York Post/Fox News Channel poll.
What are You up to NOW, RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
What are You up to NOW, RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?
We wish Tony's stirring defense of America weren't mated to his essentially adolescent nature. Sometimes this guy can seem just too clever and callow by half.
We'll take the good words, though.
We'll take the good words, though.
Top Russian central banker killed in contract 'hit'
I suspect if we knew who Vlad might not get to be president for life.
I suspect if we knew who Vlad might not get to be president for life.
Ann Richards, the "colorful" former governor of Texas, has died. She put a silver foot in Papa's mouth and he got elected anyway. We guess that ringing bit of oratory obscured a good person, but too many of our superiors are happy to take that chance. RIP.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
We'll take this as definitive: NewsMAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! counters the claim that ErrAmerica's going bankrupt.
We may well ask, though, who cares outside Al Franken's relatives.
We may well ask, though, who cares outside Al Franken's relatives.
Leon Wieseltier takes on WOODSTER THE PERV:
As I was assembling my little inventory of realisms, I came upon still another one, even bleaker and more disillusioned. "You do the best you can within the concentration camp," Woody Allen told a reporter from The Washington Post. I had no idea the East Side was so bad. "If you face reality too much," he added dolorously, "it kills you. ... It's just an awful thing, and in that context you've got to find an answer to the question: why go on?" And so on in the same undergraduate vein, just more of Allen's bargain-basement despair--but then he explained the character of the darkness. "Once you get up in years, like seventies, there's nothing good about it. The dynamite women you see on the street, that world is gone to you. ... One of the great pastimes of my life was eying girls in short skirts, and that's gone. ... I'm not in bed with any of them." So that's it: nobody is coming upstairs to see his kvetchings. He isn't getting laid and it's Auschwitz. This is not what Primo Levi had in mind. It is also a curious complaint for a married man to make; but realism is realism. Allen concluded with this lasting reflection on the human condition: "Warren Beatty once said to me many years ago, being a star is like being in a whorehouse with a credit card, and I never found that. For me, it was like being in a whorehouse with a credit card that has expired." Give the man a Gitane! Why do people continue to honor this morbid fool? What is so fascinating about his corduroy puerility? In any event, we must now expand the ranks of the undeceived, and to democratic realism, progressive realism, and ethical realism add penile realism. Compared to him, however, we are all idealists.
As I was assembling my little inventory of realisms, I came upon still another one, even bleaker and more disillusioned. "You do the best you can within the concentration camp," Woody Allen told a reporter from The Washington Post. I had no idea the East Side was so bad. "If you face reality too much," he added dolorously, "it kills you. ... It's just an awful thing, and in that context you've got to find an answer to the question: why go on?" And so on in the same undergraduate vein, just more of Allen's bargain-basement despair--but then he explained the character of the darkness. "Once you get up in years, like seventies, there's nothing good about it. The dynamite women you see on the street, that world is gone to you. ... One of the great pastimes of my life was eying girls in short skirts, and that's gone. ... I'm not in bed with any of them." So that's it: nobody is coming upstairs to see his kvetchings. He isn't getting laid and it's Auschwitz. This is not what Primo Levi had in mind. It is also a curious complaint for a married man to make; but realism is realism. Allen concluded with this lasting reflection on the human condition: "Warren Beatty once said to me many years ago, being a star is like being in a whorehouse with a credit card, and I never found that. For me, it was like being in a whorehouse with a credit card that has expired." Give the man a Gitane! Why do people continue to honor this morbid fool? What is so fascinating about his corduroy puerility? In any event, we must now expand the ranks of the undeceived, and to democratic realism, progressive realism, and ethical realism add penile realism. Compared to him, however, we are all idealists.
Think again: Iran will NOT be thrown out of the League of Nations because its very presence is a reason for the members to do nothing.
It also proudly symbolizes the continued support for the Waldheim Doctrine.
It also proudly symbolizes the continued support for the Waldheim Doctrine.
When the would-be comic novelist Howie Hairshirt calls Bill Buckleyson a "sharp-eyed satirist," we can be sure he's wearing four pair of sunglasses.
SSSSSSSSSSsssssssssssssssssssssssssssBBBBBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPP....
The sound of news hacks once again trying to explain the unexplainable.
The sound of news hacks once again trying to explain the unexplainable.
Yesterday the Postal Service sent me a credit-card bill -- on the due date. Anticipating this I sent the payment in a few days before. Somehow it got there. I'd have thanked the company for its prompt processing but it outsourced its customer service to Inja.
Sometimes the world's head isn't screwed on tightly.
Sometimes the world's head isn't screwed on tightly.
CBS' Couric slides to No. 3
Sighhhhhhhhhhhh, back to normal.
Oh well, there's this consolation:
Couric's Colonoscopist Hired as CBS On-Air MD (NYO) [MediaBistro link]
Sighhhhhhhhhhhh, back to normal.
Oh well, there's this consolation:
Couric's Colonoscopist Hired as CBS On-Air MD (NYO) [MediaBistro link]
Hey hacks! Here's another triumph for you: one of yours won -- you know...the M----m! The male Woman of the Year of the Woman! We'll be following him closely now to see how you and he (and CAIR) get along! It should be famously!
41 percent of the vote is hardly a ringing endorsement, but hey -- we rule the universe with a lot less!
(Via CQPolitics)
41 percent of the vote is hardly a ringing endorsement, but hey -- we rule the universe with a lot less!
(Via CQPolitics)
Whew! The MODERATE (ADA lifetime rating: 70; ACU lifetime rating: 37) Lincoln won his primary, meaning he has a chance now for six more years of posturing and preening.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Some foreign-policy bigwig has released Iran's much-vaunted secret document, and he says we should be hopeful even though the doc was written by a dozen state agencies, and we don't know if it's the same in the Farsi and the English, and Nukeman can play both ends against the middle, and it's twenty-one pages long and a cure for insomnia, and....
No wonder the Chamberlains would rather give up.
No wonder the Chamberlains would rather give up.
Rather than improve His papers, Pinch tries to bob-and-weave around the public by selling His TV stations.
Good luck with the stock price, Your Holiness!
(Via the usual Romy)
Good luck with the stock price, Your Holiness!
(Via the usual Romy)
Hey G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER! Now that you idiots are heading way up north again (as in $50 million a share), maybe the time's come when you can replace your ancient blogging servers with something older -- to GOOSE THE STOCK PRICE!
And maybe we can goose it even more with the new "BETA" version!
And maybe we can goose it even more with the new "BETA" version!
The sleazeball nonpareil of home video has run afoul of THE LAST TABOO -- SEXUAL EXPLOITATION OF CHILDREN.
Think what happens when THAT taboo falls.
Think what happens when THAT taboo falls.
Six con-SER-va-tives pat themselves on the back (in the ENEMY CAMP, no less!) for saying what I said nearly three years ago:
NEWT's former spokespoop writes an asinine column in which he gloats over the fact his Republicans have so thoroughly deked the Dems on the spending game (only of course he doesn't say that) they may stay in power FOREVER. Hey Fatso, if I recall correctly your ex-boss and his mouth THE PILLHEAD got you into power by complaining about how the Dems spent and spent and ran the Congress like a dictatorship -- and NOW YOU'RE DOING THE SAME THING. I should remind you, FATSO, if we had a principled opposition party, one strong on national defense and not off the deep end on social issues, you might occupy the same forlorn status as the Progressive Conservatives in Canada, who finished Brian Mulroney's tenure with TWO SEATS IN PARLIAMENT, and have yet to recover. Remember that the next time you boast.
[Link updated.]
NEWT's former spokespoop writes an asinine column in which he gloats over the fact his Republicans have so thoroughly deked the Dems on the spending game (only of course he doesn't say that) they may stay in power FOREVER. Hey Fatso, if I recall correctly your ex-boss and his mouth THE PILLHEAD got you into power by complaining about how the Dems spent and spent and ran the Congress like a dictatorship -- and NOW YOU'RE DOING THE SAME THING. I should remind you, FATSO, if we had a principled opposition party, one strong on national defense and not off the deep end on social issues, you might occupy the same forlorn status as the Progressive Conservatives in Canada, who finished Brian Mulroney's tenure with TWO SEATS IN PARLIAMENT, and have yet to recover. Remember that the next time you boast.
[Link updated.]
Really, future jernalism perfesser Shafer, isn't one Michael Wolff enough?
If insulting noise is the Web's disease, Peretz's new blog, The Spine, isn't the cure.
Neither, it would appear, are your me-di-a cri-ti-ci-sms.
If insulting noise is the Web's disease, Peretz's new blog, The Spine, isn't the cure.
Neither, it would appear, are your me-di-a cri-ti-ci-sms.
Are the TWXSTERS getting out of the rag biz -- a little at a time?
Imagine if they put the whole company up! It would be the flea market of the century!
(Via MediaBistro)
Imagine if they put the whole company up! It would be the flea market of the century!
(Via MediaBistro)
Whose word would you take? The ASSociated Press's that it didn't employ a Saddam spy or some loudmouth con-SER-va-tive bloggers saying it did?
Decisions, decisions.
Decisions, decisions.
Q. What is a pundit?
A. A pundit is someone who once got something very right and has since gotten everything very wrong.
A. A pundit is someone who once got something very right and has since gotten everything very wrong.
How the NATO "alliance" remembers 9/11: by refusing to send more soldiers into Afghanistan.
I guess the members believe the Taliban can be subjugated with wet noodles also.
I guess the members believe the Taliban can be subjugated with wet noodles also.
A quick glance through Alexa.com shows many of the biggest Web sites have had considerable surfing declines since the start of the year. We should not take Alexa or any Web-site rankings too seriously, but we wonder if an audience that spends its day panning for gold and retrieving such vast quantities of silt isn't getting a bit tired of it.
Oops: American Airlines, as much a victim of 9/11 as anyone, threatened to sue ESPNCorp for its fairy story -- through a liberal blog, meaning now the con-SER-va-tives will....
You should have just sued and been done with it.
You should have just sued and been done with it.
Another new cliche for the scribbling set: it's not the quantity, it's the quality.
PEOPLE NEWSRAG wasn't thinking that way when it gave out cheap cameras.
(Via the inevitable Romy)
PEOPLE NEWSRAG wasn't thinking that way when it gave out cheap cameras.
(Via the inevitable Romy)
We'd call this a double-whammy. Not only has interest in the former King of whatever dried up since his death, his company's stock is half where it was when he died.
Long live the -- King?
Long live the -- King?
Dick Cohen's a writer with two left feet, or maybe sixteen fingers. When he wants to say something reasonable, it comes out as a whine. Maybe there was a way Dick could have said what he said here without whining, as with his "Israel is an accident" typing, but so many pundits of either stripe love to whine, and nothing in a long, successful career in punditry has ever stopped him.
We haven't had the mid-terms yet, and already the hacks have elected a Woman of the Year of the Woman. Only she's a man. The man's also a M----m. But it's never too soon to engage in partisanship. The eeeeeeeeeeeeevil BLOGGERS OF THE MILLENNIUM have called him racist, xenophobic names. We don't like those bloggers either, but I guess whoever's racist and xenophobic is whoever's our enemy. And remember, criticism of M----ms is strictly prohibited.
GREAT START, Little Jonny Boy! Rev. Hellfire would be proud of you!
GREAT START, Little Jonny Boy! Rev. Hellfire would be proud of you!
Monday, September 11, 2006
Well, the spirit hasn't completely died out.
P. S. We posted this before the last entry but revised the time stamp for obvious reasons.
World Remembers 9-11 but Many Not Crying Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!! [Hed amended]
Here's another argument that news hacks should let their biases out full bore, much as an uncouth man with indigestion expels his gas -- it sounds and smells the same anyway -- or better still, have them run for office! We can imagine what America would be like after a few years of their misrule.
Here's another argument that news hacks should let their biases out full bore, much as an uncouth man with indigestion expels his gas -- it sounds and smells the same anyway -- or better still, have them run for office! We can imagine what America would be like after a few years of their misrule.
Hamas, Fatah to Form Coalition Government, Abbas Says
This we must see: a coalition of the corrupt and the murderous.
This we must see: a coalition of the corrupt and the murderous.
Report: Ford aims for 30,000 job cuts 4 years sooner than planned
At what point does Ford run out of people to lay off?
At what point does Ford run out of people to lay off?
Iran must build on progress in diplomatic talks and reach an agreement to suspend uranium enrichment in exchange for a deal giving the country trade and technology benefits, the UN's nuclear chief said.
``The window of opportunity is not very long,'' International Atomic Energy Agency Director General Mohamed ElBaradei said today in Vienna.
But it is surely long enough for the CHAMBERLAINS of the West to jump out.
``The window of opportunity is not very long,'' International Atomic Energy Agency Director General Mohamed ElBaradei said today in Vienna.
But it is surely long enough for the CHAMBERLAINS of the West to jump out.
Well HERE's some good news for the beleagured Wal-Mart empire:
China had a trade surplus of 18.8 bln usd in August, the official Xinhua news agency said, citing customs figures.
China had a trade surplus of 18.8 bln usd in August, the official Xinhua news agency said, citing customs figures.
Shucks, the Feds may want to regulate viral marketing.
There goes that dream.
We ought to get B. S. DEFENDER on the hustings to scream why this is such a threat to the republic.
There goes that dream.
We ought to get B. S. DEFENDER on the hustings to scream why this is such a threat to the republic.
The ninnies at the Corner are raising a big stink as to why the Official Search Engine of Communist China isn't putting the flaming buildings or jumping people or a red-white-and-blue ribbon or what not on its front page. Still we must confess it's gotten us to notice when it will run a special graphic for National Warm-'n'-Fuzzy Day -- and to looking for search engines with less than a twelve-digit market cap.
P. S. at 5:10 p.m. I shouldn't have been so crass and thoughtless but remembering the Freepers and their TARZAN routine over Barbara's truly humane and sensible remarks I can't help being a little peeved. THAT'S why I asked before: when did conservatives claim this as THEIR day?
P. S. at 5:10 p.m. I shouldn't have been so crass and thoughtless but remembering the Freepers and their TARZAN routine over Barbara's truly humane and sensible remarks I can't help being a little peeved. THAT'S why I asked before: when did conservatives claim this as THEIR day?
The Chinese intend to censor foreign news services like Reuters, meaning two things: 1. Reuters et al can get down on bended knee and promise never ever ever to offend the Chinese again, or 2. Have Yahoo! and G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE step in. They won't offend ANYONE.
First, the bad news: I’m fired. MSNBC.com has decided to end its support of “Altercation,” and indeed, all of its association with yours truly as of this Friday.
THIS WAS CAUSED BY THE VAST RIGHT-WING CONSPIRACY!!!!!
Ok, now, the good news: My friends at Media Matters for America have decided that the cause of continuing “Altercation” in its current, politically independent form to be worthy of their support. So we’re not dying, just moving.
We could say something about your brain but we'll let it pass.
(Via ROMY via GREG!!!!! who's EXTREMELY ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
THIS WAS CAUSED BY THE VAST RIGHT-WING CONSPIRACY!!!!!
Ok, now, the good news: My friends at Media Matters for America have decided that the cause of continuing “Altercation” in its current, politically independent form to be worthy of their support. So we’re not dying, just moving.
We could say something about your brain but we'll let it pass.
(Via ROMY via GREG!!!!! who's EXTREMELY ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Hey Rick! We've got a better idea: next time you invite all those BIGMEDIA honchos into some place like Lincoln Center (how much did that cost?), rig the ceiling so that you can pull a rope from the stage and huge clouds of $100 bills waft down on the guests!
You'll be doing it anyway!
GM is expected to ask attendees for more programs such as one recently inked with Viacom: Chevrolet was the official vehicle of the "MTV Video Music Awards"....
Yep! I'll bet that moved a LOT of SUVs -- especially with the SOARING ratings!
Please take our advice, Rick!
You'll be doing it anyway!
GM is expected to ask attendees for more programs such as one recently inked with Viacom: Chevrolet was the official vehicle of the "MTV Video Music Awards"....
Yep! I'll bet that moved a LOT of SUVs -- especially with the SOARING ratings!
Please take our advice, Rick!
Azerbaijan leader urges Muslim world to unite against terrorism
All well and good. The first thing you Muslims can do is call off the troops.
All well and good. The first thing you Muslims can do is call off the troops.
Somalia's Islamic rulers shut down radio station that plays 'love songs'
Hardly surprising; the word "love" does not exist in the holy cockroaches' vocabulary.
Hardly surprising; the word "love" does not exist in the holy cockroaches' vocabulary.
Well, there is one very good reason to remember. Certain people smiled that day -- and they weren't Buddhists, or Hindus, or Eskimos.
But why must this sort of thing appear EXCLUSIVELY in CONSERVATIVE Web sites?
But why must this sort of thing appear EXCLUSIVELY in CONSERVATIVE Web sites?
Oops! The company that pioneered outsourcing computer help to make customers mad is being probed by the Justice Department.
We'd say we're starting to feel sorry for Dell, but then again, maybe not.
We'd say we're starting to feel sorry for Dell, but then again, maybe not.
Ten pages on why Bill Keller is history's greatest editor.
Please, SuperAdam, couldn't you do the usual airhead pondering on celebs and show-biz?
Please, SuperAdam, couldn't you do the usual airhead pondering on celebs and show-biz?
There's a battle royale in Oak Brook: Mickey Starbucks is choosing someone to waste his patrons' money on junk television. This will be a fight to the finish -- to finish us.
BW Writers Targeted by HP
This is strange: BW writers are usually targeted by the likes of the DONALD and LEGENDARY WELCH.
This is strange: BW writers are usually targeted by the likes of the DONALD and LEGENDARY WELCH.
And in a reminder we don't need quite so many to tell us the same things over and over and OVER:
Newsroom Buyouts May Cut Dallas Paper’s Staff by 20%
(Via the usual Romy, who is just devastated)
Newsroom Buyouts May Cut Dallas Paper’s Staff by 20%
(Via the usual Romy, who is just devastated)
Today, some con-SER-va-tive high-school broadsheet that calls itself "The Evening Bulletin" though it issues in the morning plastered a picture of the blessed event on its front page, where squibs for the football team would go. How did con-SER-va-tives get to claim this day as their personal property?
And lest we forget, during the Civil War, which we regard as a cross between a romantic novel and a Trekkie convention ("Hey! Are those buttons historically accurate?"), over 600,000 soldiers died, in rankest conditions. Between the war and Lincoln's assassination and the near-conviction of Andrew Johnson, it's a wonder America survived. It did.
Finally, a confession: I'm probably the only person in America who didn't have his TV on back then. Why? I remembered how six years earlier the early-morning plugfests covered the implosion of the Murrah Building after its own awful event. They replayed it 5,000 times and jabbered all the way through. Most of us don't need to be reminded more than once.
And now, to forget -- until the tenth anniversary.
And lest we forget, during the Civil War, which we regard as a cross between a romantic novel and a Trekkie convention ("Hey! Are those buttons historically accurate?"), over 600,000 soldiers died, in rankest conditions. Between the war and Lincoln's assassination and the near-conviction of Andrew Johnson, it's a wonder America survived. It did.
Finally, a confession: I'm probably the only person in America who didn't have his TV on back then. Why? I remembered how six years earlier the early-morning plugfests covered the implosion of the Murrah Building after its own awful event. They replayed it 5,000 times and jabbered all the way through. Most of us don't need to be reminded more than once.
And now, to forget -- until the tenth anniversary.
And all this remembering has inspired a new annoying cliche -- the "new normal."
Please! When was the last time anything was normal?
And even LALA must confess 9/11 changed "few lives." Yes TRIB, most us know how to get on.
Please! When was the last time anything was normal?
And even LALA must confess 9/11 changed "few lives." Yes TRIB, most us know how to get on.
On the preceding subject -- does anyone remember the General Slocum? Over a thousand died when that steamship burned in the East River, not far from where we're supposed to remember. It's highly unlikely anyone does. There may be a statue or a plaque somewhere, but except for someone who's written a book (and that most likely not inspired by the disaster) it has gone in flames and smoke, like the ship. When we remember today we should know catastrophes aren't something holy cockroaches invented. In his autobiographical masterpiece Henry Adams spoke of America's amnesia. Say what you will, it served us well before, and it could serve us well again.
Today, we will be told so high-handedly, is a day to remember. I'd rather forget. It is impossible to forget when every tenth-rate news organization and TV station engages in its cheap anniversary-mania with a "tribute." Part of the problem is the fake Our Town routine news hacks must invoke to prove they're not the fiercest of snobs. But all this remembering does (as some hack named Jenkins attempted to say in a malevolent tantrum) is allow the holy cockroaches to reach forward from the past and inflict their obscenity on us through their images. And we are left with the present, the present of grossly incompetent officials, of life in a slough of despond, of finger pointing for finger pointing's sake. Honest, I can remember 9/11 -- and I didn't get up until about 11 that day. Let us leave the past to the past, and try somehow to overcome the deep blue national funk that threatens to sink everything in its path.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
The Guardian prints what it supposes to be an iconoclastic piece on "declining" iPod sales, and some spiritual site called MacDailyNews responds politely -- at least, as politely as the most fervent acolyte of the Religion of STEVE could:
MacDailyNews Note: iPod unit sales:
• Q4 03: 336,000
• Q1 04: 733,000 (holiday quarter)
• Q2 04: 807,000
• Q3 04: 860,000
• Q4 04: 2,016,000
• Q1 05: 4,580,000 (holiday quarter)
• Q2 05: 5,311,000
• Q3 05: 6,155,000
• Q4 05: 6,451,000
• Q1 06: 14,043,000 (holiday quarter)
• Q2 06: 8,526,000
• Q3 06: 8,111,000
DURING NO QUARTER HAVE YEAR-TO-YEAR IPOD SALES DECLINED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Overemphasis added]
Thank you for the hint, o priests of Jobism -- and the annoying audio pop-under ad that accompanied it.
(First article via the inevitable Slashdot)
MacDailyNews Note: iPod unit sales:
• Q4 03: 336,000
• Q1 04: 733,000 (holiday quarter)
• Q2 04: 807,000
• Q3 04: 860,000
• Q4 04: 2,016,000
• Q1 05: 4,580,000 (holiday quarter)
• Q2 05: 5,311,000
• Q3 05: 6,155,000
• Q4 05: 6,451,000
• Q1 06: 14,043,000 (holiday quarter)
• Q2 06: 8,526,000
• Q3 06: 8,111,000
DURING NO QUARTER HAVE YEAR-TO-YEAR IPOD SALES DECLINED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Overemphasis added]
Thank you for the hint, o priests of Jobism -- and the annoying audio pop-under ad that accompanied it.
(First article via the inevitable Slashdot)
Now that Iraqis are doing the torturing again, news hacks can safely ignore Abu Ghraib.
(Via, alas, The Corner)
(Via, alas, The Corner)
Khatami condemns 9/11 attacks, says Holocaust is a fact
But not to worry, I only did as you would have instructed -- one line for us, the other for the INFIDELS.
But not to worry, I only did as you would have instructed -- one line for us, the other for the INFIDELS.
An admission from the hard-core left (and it can't get much more hard-core than a Green Party candidate from California):
The chief concern of the Democrats at this juncture is to present themselves to the ruling class as the party that is the more effective and responsible governing party, a party that can restore confidence in the political system and extricate the U.S. from its troubles in Iraq. But the U.S. ruling class will suffer a terrible blow to its credibility as a world power if it withdraws from Iraq now. The contradiction that the Democrats face is that they stand the best chance of winning elections if they criticize the war, yet as a party they are committed to winning in Iraq, not losing.
The chief concern of the Democrats at this juncture is to present themselves to the ruling class as the party that is the more effective and responsible governing party, a party that can restore confidence in the political system and extricate the U.S. from its troubles in Iraq. But the U.S. ruling class will suffer a terrible blow to its credibility as a world power if it withdraws from Iraq now. The contradiction that the Democrats face is that they stand the best chance of winning elections if they criticize the war, yet as a party they are committed to winning in Iraq, not losing.
To the PAUL DRECKS who are always celebrating the box office: Last year, a down year, there were 19 pictures above $100 million. So far this year there are twelve. That number is not likely to grow much. If this is such a super age of entertainment why do the masses show an increasing reluctance to pay for it?
One other thing: if BoxOfficeMojo's numbers are correct this weekend is the worst for the biz in three years. How will you spin your way out of that one, PAUL DRECK?
(Corrected from FIVE YEARS after I saw this.)
One other thing: if BoxOfficeMojo's numbers are correct this weekend is the worst for the biz in three years. How will you spin your way out of that one, PAUL DRECK?
(Corrected from FIVE YEARS after I saw this.)
The Son of God's ex, whom the hacks (in their economists-predicting-growth mode) tell us is always starring in genius, and who has the help of obeisant pygmy toadies like Dick Schick to fawn her along, has landed in another Oscar®-nominatable masterwork. What shall our favorites do?
Progressives, who range from 11 to 36 percent of all evangelicals, according to various polls....
We wonder if the paper of the poor, the uneducated and the easily led should talk religion, especially one that has its own private God in St. Warren, but articles like this are an argument that if news hacks are going to take sides let them do it boldly. We are tired of the weasel words, the fig-leaf of objectivity, the holier-than-thou jernalist's calling. If LENNY wants to be partisan he should do so without conscience. News hacks hardly have any as is.
We wonder if the paper of the poor, the uneducated and the easily led should talk religion, especially one that has its own private God in St. Warren, but articles like this are an argument that if news hacks are going to take sides let them do it boldly. We are tired of the weasel words, the fig-leaf of objectivity, the holier-than-thou jernalist's calling. If LENNY wants to be partisan he should do so without conscience. News hacks hardly have any as is.
And TRIB's LALA edition says we're losing the war on terror, quoting a whole bunch of "experts" and "formers" to prove it. The other day Dow 36,000 (alas) ran a story about how economists have made so many changeable (or with GDP, unchangeable) finger-in-the-wind predictions about our economic growth rate as to prove useless. We discounted experts and formers a long time ago. We'll stick with our sense.
Meantime Forbes.com lets a washed-up left-wing radio comedian and a sinister foolish right-wing preacher gas we're losing the war, which is further proof they should shut up as well, but they love the sounds of their voices too much.
And the same outfit that says we're losing the war on terrorism also says we can't be sure of the numbers from Iraq. Yes, "experts" and "formers" are merely economists in drag.
Meantime Forbes.com lets a washed-up left-wing radio comedian and a sinister foolish right-wing preacher gas we're losing the war, which is further proof they should shut up as well, but they love the sounds of their voices too much.
And the same outfit that says we're losing the war on terrorism also says we can't be sure of the numbers from Iraq. Yes, "experts" and "formers" are merely economists in drag.
Five years ago today: We are not being searched in the subways. We are unalarmed by the sight of valises left on streetcorners. We are not asked to remove our shoes at airport security gates.
Our young men and women are not being blown up daily by roadside bombs in a land far away.
And 2,749 people who work at the World Trade Center or plan to be on airplanes in the morning go safely to their beds, for the last time.
Yes, what happened the day after will stick with us the rest of our lives, but as cataclysmic as it was we must move on. Mort Zuck vaguely recognizes this with his tough talk of "Islamofacism", but this almost automatic thought (we'd say almost an afterthought) cannot fight the covert notion 9/11 is turning into (as I said before) our equivalent of Princess Di's death, with flowers and ribbons and puppy dogs. Perhaps this thinking (so well expressed by BIGMEDIA these last few days, and to be expressed for yet one day still) that we must WALLOW in 9/11 is why we can't get Ground Zero fixed, why our national politics are in such a total funk, why the Gulf Coast is in the same rancid squalor as a year ago. Neither does it help that our BIGMEDIA STATE is based largely in New York, away from the notion what happened that day five years ago may not be quite so morbid for the rest of us.
Nearly sixty-five years ago, 2,388 Americans died, and 1,178 were wounded, at Pearl Harbor, including 83 civilians. The 2,388 went safely to their beds and bunks for the last time on December 6, not imagining a Japanese air assault. They left behind spouses, families and sweethearts too. The day after, FDR had the Congress declare war. We won the war. We enjoyed a huge prosperity. Where is our guts? Where is our common sense? Where is our hope? Buried in the 9/11 rubble?
Our young men and women are not being blown up daily by roadside bombs in a land far away.
And 2,749 people who work at the World Trade Center or plan to be on airplanes in the morning go safely to their beds, for the last time.
Yes, what happened the day after will stick with us the rest of our lives, but as cataclysmic as it was we must move on. Mort Zuck vaguely recognizes this with his tough talk of "Islamofacism", but this almost automatic thought (we'd say almost an afterthought) cannot fight the covert notion 9/11 is turning into (as I said before) our equivalent of Princess Di's death, with flowers and ribbons and puppy dogs. Perhaps this thinking (so well expressed by BIGMEDIA these last few days, and to be expressed for yet one day still) that we must WALLOW in 9/11 is why we can't get Ground Zero fixed, why our national politics are in such a total funk, why the Gulf Coast is in the same rancid squalor as a year ago. Neither does it help that our BIGMEDIA STATE is based largely in New York, away from the notion what happened that day five years ago may not be quite so morbid for the rest of us.
Nearly sixty-five years ago, 2,388 Americans died, and 1,178 were wounded, at Pearl Harbor, including 83 civilians. The 2,388 went safely to their beds and bunks for the last time on December 6, not imagining a Japanese air assault. They left behind spouses, families and sweethearts too. The day after, FDR had the Congress declare war. We won the war. We enjoyed a huge prosperity. Where is our guts? Where is our common sense? Where is our hope? Buried in the 9/11 rubble?
In DA POST!!!!! sales -- ANALYSTS gas about what they'd do to fix VIACON, which means for the most part THEY haven't a clue.
The only obvious fix is for VIACON to inflict a new higher level of its old-time contempt for the public that allowed Ken Felatta to imagine perpetual sex with SUMNER -- but with the Internet that gag may not go over as well as it used to.
The only obvious fix is for VIACON to inflict a new higher level of its old-time contempt for the public that allowed Ken Felatta to imagine perpetual sex with SUMNER -- but with the Internet that gag may not go over as well as it used to.
Elsewhere in Boy Wonder Jon's tubthumper, we call Jim Webb "an answered prayer" (in the THIRD GRAF) -- and go on for the coffee tables to say he can't make up his mind whether he wants to cut-and-run or just stay there. With answered prayers like this a certain newsrag can go to the devil.
Meantime, at FRIDAY NIGHTLIGHTS, we're getting ready for the move with this story: "Does God Want You to Be Rich?" We may well ask that as cutting a million from our circ MAY lead to localized poverty.
Thankfully we squeeze enough space among the spin and the sell to propose King Hussein's Son's peace plan. And just what is that peace plan? To negotiate. Why negotiate? To get to the "root cause" of terrorism. Such gas makes people think talking is worse than fighting.
Thankfully we squeeze enough space among the spin and the sell to propose King Hussein's Son's peace plan. And just what is that peace plan? To negotiate. Why negotiate? To get to the "root cause" of terrorism. Such gas makes people think talking is worse than fighting.
C'mon, Boy Wonder Jon, here you are starting off your career as ruler of the wor -- as editor of a POWERFUL newsrag, and you give us the HP story? The Plame Case of Business? Come on, Little Jon, get your readers worked up with the perfidy of Republicans -- or have them oohing over the genius of SHOW-BIZ! Didn't Rev. "Hellfire" Peters teach you better? He may have to lecture you at one of those dinners where he mooches off his zillionaire pupils!
Happily that other Jonny has the right idea -- he writes "SATIRE." And not very good satire at that. Or maybe it's Kafka. Guy goes around the office all day saying Kafka, no doubt. But then who expects anything good from these Ivy Leaguers?
OR:
Subscribe to NEWSWEEK, and you could win a dream vacation. (No purchase necessary.)
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Happily that other Jonny has the right idea -- he writes "SATIRE." And not very good satire at that. Or maybe it's Kafka. Guy goes around the office all day saying Kafka, no doubt. But then who expects anything good from these Ivy Leaguers?
OR:
Subscribe to NEWSWEEK, and you could win a dream vacation. (No purchase necessary.)
Subscribe? Just work there and you have the dream vacation of your life!