THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
Blogroll Me!
![[Powered by Blogger]](http://buttons.blogger.com/bloggerbutton1.gif){kind=small}
Saturday, November 05, 2005
Not too long ago we praised Entergy for the great job it was doing restoring power in its precinct, and now it wants to turn to UNCLE SUCKER for SUCCOR.
Oh well, we'll take the REUT's word for it about ConEd, but why is capitalism so often just socialism with a dollar sign?
Oh well, we'll take the REUT's word for it about ConEd, but why is capitalism so often just socialism with a dollar sign?
Murdoch would love to buy WSJ, but knows it's not for sale
SHUCKS! He'd be the PERFECT owner! His FOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!News/Weekly Standard/NEW YORK POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! side could run the CONSERVATIVE EDITION, and His 20th Century Fox/Sun/FX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! side could run the LIBERAL EDITION! GO FOR IT!
SHUCKS! He'd be the PERFECT owner! His FOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!News/Weekly Standard/NEW YORK POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! side could run the CONSERVATIVE EDITION, and His 20th Century Fox/Sun/FX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! side could run the LIBERAL EDITION! GO FOR IT!
In an off-year election, campaigns for governor in New Jersey and Virginia have turned especially nasty, dragging in Adolf Hitler and an ex-wife's claim of betrayal in negative ads that pollsters say have turned off the public.
And that's not all. A paralyzed teen in a wheelchair criticized one candidate's stem-cell research stance in New Jersey, records have been distorted in both states, and a $470,000 loan to a politically connected ex-lover sparked accusations of wrongdoing in New Jersey. Spending records were broken in both states, while polls show voters are unenthusiastic.
Here's the nice thing about being a NEWS HACK: you can harrumph and gallumph how AWFUL negative campaigning is and then THANK GOD IT'S HELPING YOUR PAYCHECK. GanNETt is well-positioned: it owns a TV station in Washington and seven newspapers in the two states, so it can reap the rewards of hypocrisy numerous ways.
So! We can have our rancid cake and eat it too! But you'd better gird for some AWFUL numbers from the ABC.
And that's not all. A paralyzed teen in a wheelchair criticized one candidate's stem-cell research stance in New Jersey, records have been distorted in both states, and a $470,000 loan to a politically connected ex-lover sparked accusations of wrongdoing in New Jersey. Spending records were broken in both states, while polls show voters are unenthusiastic.
Here's the nice thing about being a NEWS HACK: you can harrumph and gallumph how AWFUL negative campaigning is and then THANK GOD IT'S HELPING YOUR PAYCHECK. GanNETt is well-positioned: it owns a TV station in Washington and seven newspapers in the two states, so it can reap the rewards of hypocrisy numerous ways.
So! We can have our rancid cake and eat it too! But you'd better gird for some AWFUL numbers from the ABC.
The Dalai Lama recognizes wars may be just, but he is realist enough not go up against the Kingdom of Wal-Mart.
What an irony this is a YAHOO! link.
What an irony this is a YAHOO! link.
The HACKS are jumping from the proverbial frying pan into the fire covering the French riots, and their already infinitessimal truthfulness is shrinking to a cinder. We ruefully note too they're engaging in euphemisms to describe who's causing the attacks; the word of the day seems to be "Africans" -- and the HACKS are so dense they don't see the RACIST overtones of trying not to describe who the rioters are -- Muslims of African descent. There is something about riots that causes hacks to go into their preaching mode or their ostrich mode, and when they do, we'd prefer they do their burrow-in-a-cave-and-stay-there mode.
So far, though, the only evidence of coordination is Internet blogs by teenagers urging copycat violence elsewhere in France, and the use of mobile telephones to apparently track police movements.
PROFESSOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PROFESSOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What do Pat Boone and Bono have in common? It turns out they are both fans of the Rev. Billy Graham.
Which proves his usefulness.
Which proves his usefulness.
Who knows? Maybe His scribblers felt sorry for the God for reporting His worst performance in FOUR YEARS. A few rate hikes and He'll be THE DARLING OF AMERICA'S LUXURY NEWS SUITES again.
LET THEM EAT ENDORSEMENTS!!!!! ST. WARREN'S TOENAIL FUNGUS REVIEW (YOUR HOLINESS!!!!!) has issued a RINGING AFFIRMATION that PAPERS should NOT RUN ENDORSEMENTS: it supports 16 DEMOCRATS and TWO REPUBLICANS for the Virginia House of Delegates. In so many words the editors at THE SEAT OF ALL WISDOM have told their readers to go to HELL. They do not now believe that they need even wear a fig leaf of objectivity; this makes it official. And no, we do not recognize any WALL OF SEPARATION between editorial and reporting, as both sides root from common sidelines against their readers.
And yet ST. WARREN's cherubim will, in typical NEWS HACK fashion, continue to TWIST THE KNIFE in OUR BACK by malignly insisting they ARE SO IMPARTIAL, which makes one hope more than a few of these scribblers will spend some time in the afterlife wedged under a DISEASED TOENAIL.
P. S. We can only wonder what the ratio is of political endorsements in the big papers. SIEG HEIL!
And yet ST. WARREN's cherubim will, in typical NEWS HACK fashion, continue to TWIST THE KNIFE in OUR BACK by malignly insisting they ARE SO IMPARTIAL, which makes one hope more than a few of these scribblers will spend some time in the afterlife wedged under a DISEASED TOENAIL.
P. S. We can only wonder what the ratio is of political endorsements in the big papers. SIEG HEIL!
Democrats Move to Exploit Iraq Missteps
TRANSLATION: All the party of Moveon.org has is retreat, withdraw and prosecute. How do Harry "Secret Fundraiser" Reid and Congresswoman Babs expect to win back control of government with loonies on their side?
TRANSLATION: All the party of Moveon.org has is retreat, withdraw and prosecute. How do Harry "Secret Fundraiser" Reid and Congresswoman Babs expect to win back control of government with loonies on their side?
Friday, November 04, 2005
DER HOMELAND SECURITY NEWS OF THE MONTH:
PERRYOPOLIS, Pa. (AP) -- A bomb squad blew up a metal pipe that had a battery, wires, rope and an electrical switch, only to realize it was an eighth-grade science project.
"An electromagnetic fishing pole," Allegheny County Bomb Squad Sgt. Robert Clark said, holding the contraption with the battery blown off.
PERRYOPOLIS, Pa. (AP) -- A bomb squad blew up a metal pipe that had a battery, wires, rope and an electrical switch, only to realize it was an eighth-grade science project.
"An electromagnetic fishing pole," Allegheny County Bomb Squad Sgt. Robert Clark said, holding the contraption with the battery blown off.
With the fate of the world and BROADCAST JERNALISM hanging in the balance, ROSIE'S NEPHEW, who has already sacrificed his HEALTH for the truth, gets into a shoving match with a NONBELIEVER.
This may not be KENNETH, but he's getting there.
This may not be KENNETH, but he's getting there.
THE CONSPIRACY, stung by the GREAT PUBLICITY, is offering GRANDDAD an INSTALLMENT PLAN.
This from the men who perfected ACCOUNTING.
This from the men who perfected ACCOUNTING.
Surprise: Coke's ditching its Vanilla flavor. A rememberance of the taste and we know why: vanilla extract and sugar in fizzy water. RIP.
More doo-dads for your screen:
[B]y Bill Gate’s [SIC!] own admission, times are changing. Startup Zimbra has already developed an impressive and full-featured substitute for Microsoft’s collaborative enterprise software. This software gives users all kinds of AJAX “mash-ups,” meaning that different AJAX applications with different features are mixed together making "Frankenstein-type" programs--only they work surprisingly well. For instance, mousing over an address in an e-mail received with Zimbra causes a small Google Maps map of the address to display next to the address. Mousing over a time or date brings up your calendar of that time.
Pretty soon any time you click on anything you'll get a menu with fifty options. Frankenstein may be all too apt.
And Bill's getting into the "portal" biz. Don't we have enough look-alike stations to nowhere?
[B]y Bill Gate’s [SIC!] own admission, times are changing. Startup Zimbra has already developed an impressive and full-featured substitute for Microsoft’s collaborative enterprise software. This software gives users all kinds of AJAX “mash-ups,” meaning that different AJAX applications with different features are mixed together making "Frankenstein-type" programs--only they work surprisingly well. For instance, mousing over an address in an e-mail received with Zimbra causes a small Google Maps map of the address to display next to the address. Mousing over a time or date brings up your calendar of that time.
Pretty soon any time you click on anything you'll get a menu with fifty options. Frankenstein may be all too apt.
And Bill's getting into the "portal" biz. Don't we have enough look-alike stations to nowhere?
Police broke up a poker game at a private club, arrested 95 people and seized $25,000 in what they called the city's biggest gambling raid since Prohibition.
You mean it wasn't on television?
You mean it wasn't on television?
At Wednesday night's black-tie White House dinner for the Prince of Wales and his consort, Camilla, the royal missus committed the selfless act of wearing such a dull ensemble that she made first lady Laura Bush look as though she had stepped from the cover of a glamourpuss magazine. Standing alone, Mrs. Bush looked lovely. But next to Camilla, whose Robinson Valentino blazer and skirt made her look like a large rectangle, the first lady reminded one of a radiant bride shining brightly next to a dutifully bland bridesmaid.
We could say something about squares, but that's too easy. (We like the princie anyway.)
One of the 39,562 reasons I cannot STAND NEWS HACKS is the "FAMILY-NEWSPAPER" gag. Usually the hacks trot it out when they're defending something but flat-out afraid to defend it. Well if what they're defending can't be put in plain language, mightn't that make it indefensible? NEWS HACKS will say they only use it to keep from offending people, a miserable laff riot as they go overboard with the most egregious offense every day. Rather than resort to this moldy strategem, it might be better if the HACKS didn't write on some things at ALL.
Carter condemns abortion culture
It had been better to have this moral suasion, say, 28 years ago, but we'll take it.
It had been better to have this moral suasion, say, 28 years ago, but we'll take it.
Dana "Surfer Dude" Rohrabacher gets an option to have his SITCOM produced!
Well, it must be a sitcom. He's a CONGRESSMAN, right?
Following the sale of the script to Joseph Medawar, a little-known producer, Rohrabacher helped introduce Medawar to at least five Republican congressmen and staff members at the House of Representatives' Homeland Security Committee in 2004. At the time, Medawar was pitching his latest Hollywood project — a TV series about the Department of Homeland Security. [PFFH-HH-HH!!!!!]
One of those congressmen was former Rep. Christopher Cox (R-Newport Beach), then chair of the Homeland Security Committee. Rohrabacher said he also made calls that helped Medawar and his crew gain access to officials in federal law enforcement agencies who briefed them on the inner workings of the federal government.
It IS a sitcom!
Well, it must be a sitcom. He's a CONGRESSMAN, right?
Following the sale of the script to Joseph Medawar, a little-known producer, Rohrabacher helped introduce Medawar to at least five Republican congressmen and staff members at the House of Representatives' Homeland Security Committee in 2004. At the time, Medawar was pitching his latest Hollywood project — a TV series about the Department of Homeland Security. [PFFH-HH-HH!!!!!]
One of those congressmen was former Rep. Christopher Cox (R-Newport Beach), then chair of the Homeland Security Committee. Rohrabacher said he also made calls that helped Medawar and his crew gain access to officials in federal law enforcement agencies who briefed them on the inner workings of the federal government.
It IS a sitcom!
Great news from Ethiopia: it has the French disease too -- and this being THE REUT, it would NEVER tell us who makes up the majority of Ethiopians.
Mike Reidel is in EXCELLENT form today: he's saying Steve Wynn's expensive puppet-show Broadway in Vegas is a BUST, in part because
"Q" may...be too sophisticated for Vegas audiences, whose tastes generally run to animal acts, Celine Dion and slot machines. [PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!]
And I'd say Warner Bros. should stick to -- movies but all it makes are FRANCHISES.
"Q" may...be too sophisticated for Vegas audiences, whose tastes generally run to animal acts, Celine Dion and slot machines. [PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!]
And I'd say Warner Bros. should stick to -- movies but all it makes are FRANCHISES.
“I don’t know if an oil company can be liked or what it can say or do to be liked.”
You mean ADVERTISING HAS ITS LIMITS?
And here's the awful thing: substitute "any" for "an oil" and you have big business's visceral hatred of America in a nutshell.
You mean ADVERTISING HAS ITS LIMITS?
And here's the awful thing: substitute "any" for "an oil" and you have big business's visceral hatred of America in a nutshell.
Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-da-DUT-DUT!
If "Chicken Little," the first of four computer-generated cartoons from Disney's revamped animation division, is the best the studio can do, it had better continue negotiating with Pixar.
Can you imagine a line like that in a review fifty years ago?
Could anyone imagine the -- MOVIES of today fifty years ago?
If "Chicken Little," the first of four computer-generated cartoons from Disney's revamped animation division, is the best the studio can do, it had better continue negotiating with Pixar.
Can you imagine a line like that in a review fifty years ago?
Could anyone imagine the -- MOVIES of today fifty years ago?
It's 2005, and the spy-novel men are American officials whose un-American treatment of prisoners in the war on terrorism has shamed our nation. [Home-page tease]
I'm thinking now every time NEWS HACKS have a beef with people in our government they'll call it "un-American." (Oddly and predictably, the word isn't in the article.) I wouldn't do that, St. Warren. The word originated with Communist-hunters, who were (as we all know from your indoctrina -- from your REPORTING) the height of EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL. Perhaps un-American should be expunged from the NEWS HACK'S vocabulary because it is a firecracker of a word, or maybe a Molotov cocktail, one whose sole purpose is to inflict hurt. Problem is, your firecrackers have a way of boomeranging.
I'm thinking now every time NEWS HACKS have a beef with people in our government they'll call it "un-American." (Oddly and predictably, the word isn't in the article.) I wouldn't do that, St. Warren. The word originated with Communist-hunters, who were (as we all know from your indoctrina -- from your REPORTING) the height of EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL. Perhaps un-American should be expunged from the NEWS HACK'S vocabulary because it is a firecracker of a word, or maybe a Molotov cocktail, one whose sole purpose is to inflict hurt. Problem is, your firecrackers have a way of boomeranging.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
DOW 36,000 and his GANG DO IT AGAIN:
It is a human trait to sympathize with a noble underdog -- but it is also a problem for a free society. For it amounts to acting on prejudice rather than on principle, which is just what advocates of civil rights should be against.
Charles Payne, a commentator on Fox News and CEO of Wall Street Strategies, this week came to the defense of two groups that liberals just love to hate -- oil and pharmaceutical companies.
Payne, who has been described by the liberal blog Newshounds as "the Fox token-minority-who-supports Bush," (how else are you going to keep minorities in the Democratic camp except through sophisticated racial epithet?) argued on Tuesday that threats, such as Dennis Kucinich's Gas Price Spike Act of 2005 to relieve oil companies of their profits and those against pharmaceutical companies to violate their patents on drugs against such epidemics as avian flu, amount to almost a communist attack on property rights.
One doesn't need to go that far, but there is a tendency to forget what it is that Rosa Parks -- and before her our forefathers were fighting for -- when the "victims" of the theft are not sympathetic. It is why, when such things are proposed, that we need our courts to protect our individual rights, but it is also why we need to ourselves look at cases in their simplest terms -- to seek out the principle that we are acting upon, and recognize the rights we may undermine.
I think it is time to let Rosa Parks rest in peace -- and for DOW 36,000 and his GANG to SHUT UP.
It is a human trait to sympathize with a noble underdog -- but it is also a problem for a free society. For it amounts to acting on prejudice rather than on principle, which is just what advocates of civil rights should be against.
Charles Payne, a commentator on Fox News and CEO of Wall Street Strategies, this week came to the defense of two groups that liberals just love to hate -- oil and pharmaceutical companies.
Payne, who has been described by the liberal blog Newshounds as "the Fox token-minority-who-supports Bush," (how else are you going to keep minorities in the Democratic camp except through sophisticated racial epithet?) argued on Tuesday that threats, such as Dennis Kucinich's Gas Price Spike Act of 2005 to relieve oil companies of their profits and those against pharmaceutical companies to violate their patents on drugs against such epidemics as avian flu, amount to almost a communist attack on property rights.
One doesn't need to go that far, but there is a tendency to forget what it is that Rosa Parks -- and before her our forefathers were fighting for -- when the "victims" of the theft are not sympathetic. It is why, when such things are proposed, that we need our courts to protect our individual rights, but it is also why we need to ourselves look at cases in their simplest terms -- to seek out the principle that we are acting upon, and recognize the rights we may undermine.
I think it is time to let Rosa Parks rest in peace -- and for DOW 36,000 and his GANG to SHUT UP.
Bush's Integrity Is Questioned According to Post-ABC Poll
And WE'RE the people who can QUESTION IT!
ST. WARREN!! WILL YOU STOP WITH THAT TOENAIL FUNGUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And WE'RE the people who can QUESTION IT!
ST. WARREN!! WILL YOU STOP WITH THAT TOENAIL FUNGUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The EDDIE RENDELL of VEGAS has a SUGGESTION:
Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman has suggested that those who deface freeways with graffiti should have their thumbs cut off on television.
The bad news is it would deprive the world of ART. The good news is the same media who'd deplore it might make money out of it.
Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman has suggested that those who deface freeways with graffiti should have their thumbs cut off on television.
The bad news is it would deprive the world of ART. The good news is the same media who'd deplore it might make money out of it.
The looniest leftists had another mass psychosis yesterday -- and oddly enough we didn't hear of it until we stumbled onto this Trib piece which natch downplays the organizers, who include WACKOS for STALINISM.
Oh well, such is the life of being forever angry -- people take it for granted.
ST. WARREN wants PRESIDENT ROVE to RESIGN, meaning he WON'T.
Meantime His Loyal Servant WHINY CRYBABY RICHARD wanders into JORDAN (we presume by accident) and opines WE'VE TURNED THE MIDDLE EAST INTO A DISASTER!!!!!
Your Holiness, we know You believe Yourself beyond the laws of man and the Universe (which after all You created), but will the time ever come when You may be WRONG?
Meantime His Loyal Servant WHINY CRYBABY RICHARD wanders into JORDAN (we presume by accident) and opines WE'VE TURNED THE MIDDLE EAST INTO A DISASTER!!!!!
Your Holiness, we know You believe Yourself beyond the laws of man and the Universe (which after all You created), but will the time ever come when You may be WRONG?
BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURP:
Criticism of media coverage of the Iraq war and the effects that it has on the public dominated a speech given yesterday at the Kennedy School of Government (KSG) by Michael A. Massing ’74, contributing editor for the Columbia Journalism Review and the New York Review of Books [ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz. --ED]....
“I’m just exasperated by the lack of good coverage,” Massing said in his speech. “I think that the thinness of that coverage reflects the general lack of familiarity that journalists have with the region.”...
Massing also said the media’s fear of causing a negative reaction from the American public might be responsible for the incomplete coverage.
Which may have something to do, Mike, with our P-Ulitzer-winning WITHDRAWAL FROM INDOCHINA.
Criticism of media coverage of the Iraq war and the effects that it has on the public dominated a speech given yesterday at the Kennedy School of Government (KSG) by Michael A. Massing ’74, contributing editor for the Columbia Journalism Review and the New York Review of Books [ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz. --ED]....
“I’m just exasperated by the lack of good coverage,” Massing said in his speech. “I think that the thinness of that coverage reflects the general lack of familiarity that journalists have with the region.”...
Massing also said the media’s fear of causing a negative reaction from the American public might be responsible for the incomplete coverage.
Which may have something to do, Mike, with our P-Ulitzer-winning WITHDRAWAL FROM INDOCHINA.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
SAM LITTLE DOES IT AGAIN:
LGF reader Baikal emailed about these upsetting pictures posted by Bareknucklepolitics.com with the title: 8 Year Old Iranian Boy Caught Stealing Bread. Those readers who were skeptical of the title, it turns out, were correct....
You didn't sound so skeptical when you FIRST POSTED IT, SAM.
One of these days there'll be a big scandal in the blogosphere, maybe not BLATHERGATE, but a lot of people will be embarrassed -- and SAM LITTLE will be at the CENTER of it.
LGF reader Baikal emailed about these upsetting pictures posted by Bareknucklepolitics.com with the title: 8 Year Old Iranian Boy Caught Stealing Bread. Those readers who were skeptical of the title, it turns out, were correct....
You didn't sound so skeptical when you FIRST POSTED IT, SAM.
One of these days there'll be a big scandal in the blogosphere, maybe not BLATHERGATE, but a lot of people will be embarrassed -- and SAM LITTLE will be at the CENTER of it.
Officials deny profiling of Muslims detained at Giants game
THIS looks like a job for -- SU - PERHOOPER!!!!!
THIS looks like a job for -- SU - PERHOOPER!!!!!
Here's good news: a developer's renovating the Book-Cadillac, the grande dame of Detroit hostelries that has known better days. EDDIE would attribute this to HIS ELIXIR of "GAMING," and HIS RENDELLMINIUMS, but a building like that is just too good to tear down.
Now to see to it that Detroit is no longer a city of the dead building.
Far be it from us to say a good word for G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE, but its book digitizing process could save some worthy literature from total oblivion in the vaults. It does not escape us either that several of the biggest names in "publishing" are members of THE CONSPIRACY, which has always viewed its vaults as a JUNK YARD.
Shucks, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang goes to the scrap heap.
By rights every Broadway theme park belongs there.
By rights every Broadway theme park belongs there.
The sacrifices of an ac-TOR:
Strathairn Puffed on Dozens of Cigarettes
Well, it was for a -- NOBLE CAUSE.
Good night, and (COUGH! COUGH!) good luck.
Strathairn Puffed on Dozens of Cigarettes
Well, it was for a -- NOBLE CAUSE.
Good night, and (COUGH! COUGH!) good luck.
Well this should make the HACKS' day:
Senior al Qaeda captive escaped US prison: official
And what peculiar set of circumstances led to this fine mess? Was this an INSIDE job? Or just our government's own smiley-faced brand of carelessness?
Senior al Qaeda captive escaped US prison: official
And what peculiar set of circumstances led to this fine mess? Was this an INSIDE job? Or just our government's own smiley-faced brand of carelessness?
Elsewhere at PEOPLE WARNER:
Warner Cuts More Than 5% of Studio Staff
We feel sorry for those who lost their jobs, but every time there are big layoffs in BIGMEDIA the chances of it INFLICTING itself on us do grow microscopically smaller.
Warner Cuts More Than 5% of Studio Staff
We feel sorry for those who lost their jobs, but every time there are big layoffs in BIGMEDIA the chances of it INFLICTING itself on us do grow microscopically smaller.
GOBBLEDYGOOK:
50 says he disagrees with West's infamous [!!!!!!!!!!] statement that "George Bush doesn't care about black people," proclaimed during a September telethon for Hurricane Katrina victims.
"I think people responded to it the best way they can," 50 told ContactMusic.com. "What Kanye West was saying, I don't know where that came from."
Instead, 50 said, "The New Orleans disaster was meant to happen. It was an act of God."
JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONAH!!!!!! AN HONORARY CON-SER-VA-TIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND HE LOVES GUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
50 says he disagrees with West's infamous [!!!!!!!!!!] statement that "George Bush doesn't care about black people," proclaimed during a September telethon for Hurricane Katrina victims.
"I think people responded to it the best way they can," 50 told ContactMusic.com. "What Kanye West was saying, I don't know where that came from."
Instead, 50 said, "The New Orleans disaster was meant to happen. It was an act of God."
JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONAH!!!!!! AN HONORARY CON-SER-VA-TIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND HE LOVES GUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
An 800-pound gorilla has entered Romy's office.
We knew what the hacks were up to when they started saying GRIM with a laugh. We know what they're up to with their on-the-spot videos of Baghdad bombings. We know what they're up to when they PERSONALIZE the coverage. Several millions in Southeast Asia might know what they're up to as well, but they're not alive to know, thanks to the AWARD-WINNING EXPLOITS OF NEWS HACKS.
We knew what the hacks were up to when they started saying GRIM with a laugh. We know what they're up to with their on-the-spot videos of Baghdad bombings. We know what they're up to when they PERSONALIZE the coverage. Several millions in Southeast Asia might know what they're up to as well, but they're not alive to know, thanks to the AWARD-WINNING EXPLOITS OF NEWS HACKS.
The size of the market for such conservative films first grew clear in the late sixties and seventies, when Hollywood nearly stopped making them. Swept up in the era’s revolutionary spirit, the industry junked its decades-old production code—which mandated respect for marriage, the military, and religion, and forbade cussin’ and nudity—and went in for movies geared to “a rebellious generation . . . challenging every cherished tenet of American society,” as leftist film scholars Seth Cagin and Philip Dray approvingly put it. Production-code-era Hollywood hadn’t ignored the darker side of human existence, but even its hardest-boiled noir films weren’t anything like this. The countercultural movies of “New Hollywood”—such as Arthur Penn’s violent, criminal-glorifying Bonnie and Clyde (1967), Robert Altman’s cynical antiwar comedy M.A.S.H. (1970), Hal Ashby’s sordid paean to the sexual revolution Shampoo (1975), and Martin Scorcese’s urban nightmare Taxi Driver (1976)—wowed critics, who shared their anti-establishment and anti-American attitudes.
But moviegoers turned up their noses. Weekly film attendance in 1967, the first year after Hollywood dumped the production code, plummeted to 17.8 million, from 38 million the year before (television had already eroded moviegoing from its late-1940s peak of 90 million a week). “In a single one-year period,” Medved notes, “more than half the movie audience disappeared—by far the largest one-year decline in the history of the motion picture business.” That audience then hovered around 20 million for the next three decades, despite a growing U.S. population.
There’s no mystery why so many stay home. Still dominated by countercultural types, Hollywood keeps churning out “edgy,” envelope-pushing movies—more than half of its films receive R ratings, for example—and Americans keep giving them thumbs-down, as the correlation of profit and ratings shows. Only five of the 50 top-grossing movies of all time have R ratings, and 13 of the top 100. A big 2005 Dove Foundation study examined the 3,000 most widely distributed Hollywood movies from 1989 through 2003 in each ratings category. It found PG- and PG-13-rated films between three and four times more profitable on average ththan R-rated ones—and G films, like this year’s hit nature documentary, March of the Penguins blahblahblah....
We know all about Hollywood's ATTITUDE, and how it thumbs it nose at the profit motive along with its audience, but isn't this the same Brian C. Anderson who had to make himself famous as the #1 FAN of SOUTH PARK?
But moviegoers turned up their noses. Weekly film attendance in 1967, the first year after Hollywood dumped the production code, plummeted to 17.8 million, from 38 million the year before (television had already eroded moviegoing from its late-1940s peak of 90 million a week). “In a single one-year period,” Medved notes, “more than half the movie audience disappeared—by far the largest one-year decline in the history of the motion picture business.” That audience then hovered around 20 million for the next three decades, despite a growing U.S. population.
There’s no mystery why so many stay home. Still dominated by countercultural types, Hollywood keeps churning out “edgy,” envelope-pushing movies—more than half of its films receive R ratings, for example—and Americans keep giving them thumbs-down, as the correlation of profit and ratings shows. Only five of the 50 top-grossing movies of all time have R ratings, and 13 of the top 100. A big 2005 Dove Foundation study examined the 3,000 most widely distributed Hollywood movies from 1989 through 2003 in each ratings category. It found PG- and PG-13-rated films between three and four times more profitable on average ththan R-rated ones—and G films, like this year’s hit nature documentary, March of the Penguins blahblahblah....
We know all about Hollywood's ATTITUDE, and how it thumbs it nose at the profit motive along with its audience, but isn't this the same Brian C. Anderson who had to make himself famous as the #1 FAN of SOUTH PARK?
Meantime turnips made PEOPLE WARNER richer. There's nothing like the taste of TURNIP GREENS, right KING RICHARD?
Also the company's being investigated for playing TWX with its magazine circulation. Given that it's a prime member of THE CONSPIRACY we'll say GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT.
Also the company's being investigated for playing TWX with its magazine circulation. Given that it's a prime member of THE CONSPIRACY we'll say GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT.
Cablevision Approves $3 Billion Dividend
Well! That's a lot of "value for the money" -- and EXCELLENT CUSTOMER SERVICE!
Well! That's a lot of "value for the money" -- and EXCELLENT CUSTOMER SERVICE!
More impartial, unbiased news:
US terrorism specialists Daniel Benjamin and Steven Simon have reached a stark conclusion about the war on terrorism: the United States is losing.
Despite an early US victory over the Taliban and Al Qaeda in Afghanistan, President Bush's policies have created a haven for terrorism in Iraq that escalates the potential for Islamic violence against Europe and the United States,
the two former Clinton administration officials say.
Wait a second, Dave: shouldn't that be insurgency, or militancy? Or do we get a special dispensation when a REPUBLICAN's in the White House?
PLUS IT'S A PLUG FOR A BOOK. A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD (MILITANCY DIVISION) TO DAVE!
P. S.
US fortunes could improve, the authors say, if Washington took a number of politically challenging steps, such as bolstering public diplomacy with trade pacts aimed at expanding middle-class influence in countries such as Pakistan.
TRANSLATION: We're DEMOCRATS -- and we don't have THE FOGGIEST NOTION WHAT WE'RE DOING.
US terrorism specialists Daniel Benjamin and Steven Simon have reached a stark conclusion about the war on terrorism: the United States is losing.
Despite an early US victory over the Taliban and Al Qaeda in Afghanistan, President Bush's policies have created a haven for terrorism in Iraq that escalates the potential for Islamic violence against Europe and the United States,
the two former Clinton administration officials say.
Wait a second, Dave: shouldn't that be insurgency, or militancy? Or do we get a special dispensation when a REPUBLICAN's in the White House?
PLUS IT'S A PLUG FOR A BOOK. A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD (MILITANCY DIVISION) TO DAVE!
P. S.
US fortunes could improve, the authors say, if Washington took a number of politically challenging steps, such as bolstering public diplomacy with trade pacts aimed at expanding middle-class influence in countries such as Pakistan.
TRANSLATION: We're DEMOCRATS -- and we don't have THE FOGGIEST NOTION WHAT WE'RE DOING.
I think this is why the labor movement is kaput these days: when members strike, it's often a blameless third party that suffers.
Here we go! A big shareholder wants KnightRidder to sell itself -- which, if it's done right, could lead to lots of newspaper companies selling themselves, meaning we get two or three giant newspaper companies, which, in practical terms, would merely formalize the press's conformity.
The prima donnas here in Philthydelphia are hearing it from the fans:
As an aside, union spokesman Bob Bedard asked for "a little forgiveness" from the public for the inconveniences caused by the strike.
But Bob, both sides wanted this strike! The longer the better! Still, as I said, when it's over around February or March, you'll face worse than anger, you'll face indifference -- and if there's any justice the incompetents at SEPTA will lay off a few of your lazy buddies as a present.
As an aside, union spokesman Bob Bedard asked for "a little forgiveness" from the public for the inconveniences caused by the strike.
But Bob, both sides wanted this strike! The longer the better! Still, as I said, when it's over around February or March, you'll face worse than anger, you'll face indifference -- and if there's any justice the incompetents at SEPTA will lay off a few of your lazy buddies as a present.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Well, perhaps it's more polite to have a warning before you get hosed. A Manhattan judge said Tuesday that he is likely to deny a motion that would have dismissed most of a lawsuit challenging Richard Grasso's $187.5 million severance package from the New York Stock Exchange.
FREE ENTERPRISE CON-SER-VA-TIVES! YOU MUST PROTEST THIS OUTRAGEOUS MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE! WHO SAYS LIBERALS ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO CAN PROTEST? ORGANIZE "CITIZENS FOR GRASSO"! THOUSANDS would sign up! Like LARRY "GREED" KUDLOW, and DOW 36,000, and, uh, er...
THE STAFF OF REASON!
FREE ENTERPRISE CON-SER-VA-TIVES! YOU MUST PROTEST THIS OUTRAGEOUS MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE! WHO SAYS LIBERALS ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO CAN PROTEST? ORGANIZE "CITIZENS FOR GRASSO"! THOUSANDS would sign up! Like LARRY "GREED" KUDLOW, and DOW 36,000, and, uh, er...
THE STAFF OF REASON!
3 stabbed near White House Homeless man in custody.
Another free thinker exercising his First Amendment rights, sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Another free thinker exercising his First Amendment rights, sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
From a Sun-Times profit center:
Roger Ebert's Current Reviews
• G (R)
• The Legend of Zorro (PG)
• The Night of the Hunter (Not rated)
• Nine Lives (R)
• Prime (PG-13)
• Shopgirl (R)
• Three... Extremes (R)
• The Weather Man (R)
• Where the Truth Lies (Not rated)
Not counting The Night of the Hunter -- an old film and a "classic" film and therefore from another galaxy -- let's do the math: 23.5 stars divided by 7 movies equals 3.357 stars. It is foolish to judge reviews by star ratings -- they only obscure matters, which is why movie ad-blurbists love them -- and maybe Rog has been in a mood lately, but obviously he thinks we're in a MEGA-PLATINUM AGE OF MOVIES. I've long believed Rog and ESPECIALLY his late unlamented partner in millions GENE raved three-quarters of the movies they "reviewed," and judging that GENE's widow put his condo up for $8.25 million I'd say they did well by it. Whether WE'VE done well by it is, natch, another matter.
Roger Ebert's Current Reviews
• G (R)
• The Legend of Zorro (PG)
• The Night of the Hunter (Not rated)
• Nine Lives (R)
• Prime (PG-13)
• Shopgirl (R)
• Three... Extremes (R)
• The Weather Man (R)
• Where the Truth Lies (Not rated)
Not counting The Night of the Hunter -- an old film and a "classic" film and therefore from another galaxy -- let's do the math: 23.5 stars divided by 7 movies equals 3.357 stars. It is foolish to judge reviews by star ratings -- they only obscure matters, which is why movie ad-blurbists love them -- and maybe Rog has been in a
mood lately, but obviously he thinks we're in a MEGA-PLATINUM AGE OF MOVIES. I've long believed Rog and ESPECIALLY his late unlamented partner in millions GENE raved three-quarters of the movies they "reviewed," and judging that GENE's widow put his condo up for $8.25 million I'd say they did well by it. Whether WE'VE done well by it is, natch, another matter.
Ivan Askwith, a media analyst with MIT's Convergence Culture Consortium, writes frequently on the intersection of technology, entertainment, and culture.
Today is Stale.com's day; now this analyst has just posted about how Steve's video iPod will allow "darker" television and promote shows with "cult followings" -- proof that MIT, alas, has dummies too.
Today is Stale.com's day; now this analyst has just posted about how Steve's video iPod will allow "darker" television and promote shows with "cult followings" -- proof that MIT, alas, has dummies too.
Aidan Wasley teaches at the University of Georgia, in Athens, Ga.
So why did you have to deliver a lecture on bad movie-blurb writing in Stale.com?
Honestly, some schools should fire their professors and just be athuhletic programs.
So why did you have to deliver a lecture on bad movie-blurb writing in Stale.com?
Honestly, some schools should fire their professors and just be athuhletic programs.
I'm also in a bad mood because three people shut down our corner supermarket because they couldn't stand the noise of its deliveries -- and it's going to be replaced by a 40,000th CVS.
To quote the last line of the story:
"You know, the Hicks Street people [i.e., the people doing the complaining] should really recall an old proverb: Be careful what you wish for."
To quote the last line of the story:
"You know, the Hicks Street people [i.e., the people doing the complaining] should really recall an old proverb: Be careful what you wish for."
There is nothing like G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER being down for at least six hours to put me in a bad mood.
Unless it's G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE hitting another NEW RECORD HIGH.
Unless it's G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE hitting another NEW RECORD HIGH.
How fitting that G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER should have a breakdown on ANOTHER RECORD HIGH DAY.
Just remember, Larry and Sergey: what's happening to DELL could someday happen -- to YOU!
Just remember, Larry and Sergey: what's happening to DELL could someday happen -- to YOU!
The American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers made VIACON a profit.
Thank you for your timely charitable donation -- of OUR money.
Thank you for your timely charitable donation -- of OUR money.
Some hack says "diversity" trumps all.
This from the second most monotheistic paper in America.
HEY ST. WARREN! WHAT'S WITH YOUR OBSESSION WITH TOENAIL FUNGUS?
This from the second most monotheistic paper in America.
HEY ST. WARREN! WHAT'S WITH YOUR OBSESSION WITH TOENAIL FUNGUS?
Monday, October 31, 2005
Cable Costs Will Keep Rising, ESPN To Double By 2009
The future is a la carte over the WEB, whether the media tyrannies and THE CABLE CONSPIRACY LIKE IT OR NOT.
The future is a la carte over the WEB, whether the media tyrannies and THE CABLE CONSPIRACY LIKE IT OR NOT.
In his 15 years on the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Third Circuit in Philadelphia, Alito repeatedly has upheld the rights of companies to enforce the terms of their contracts, including clauses requiring binding arbitration and specifying where the parties can sue. He's also favored corporate defendants when there is a question about how to apply federal regulations and has been tough on plaintiffs accusing companies of committing securities fraud.
Do I hear con-SER-va-tives going BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA?
Well, all we can say is LIBERALS HAD THEIR CHANCE.
Do I hear con-SER-va-tives going BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA?
Well, all we can say is LIBERALS HAD THEIR CHANCE.
Did computer geek Steve Jobs have a system meltdown?
On Friday, the svengali-like CEO of Apple Computer and Pixar Animated Studios lashed out at author Fredric Alan Maxwell after he sent Jobs a 4,000-word article he wrote for Fast Company magazine about the untold story of Jobs' biological father, a Syrian immigrant and political science professor named Abdulfattah Jandali.
"Are you a nut case?" Jobs demanded, signing the oneliner "Steve."
Maxwell fired back: "Are you?"
Just A problem: one of these nut cases is worth ZILLIONS.
On Friday, the svengali-like CEO of Apple Computer and Pixar Animated Studios lashed out at author Fredric Alan Maxwell after he sent Jobs a 4,000-word article he wrote for Fast Company magazine about the untold story of Jobs' biological father, a Syrian immigrant and political science professor named Abdulfattah Jandali.
"Are you a nut case?" Jobs demanded, signing the oneliner "Steve."
Maxwell fired back: "Are you?"
Just A problem: one of these nut cases is worth ZILLIONS.
Dell Says Its Third-Quarter Revenue Missed Company's Forecasts
STERNO!!!!! YOU'RE ALMOST AS POWERFUL AS YAHWEH!!!!!
Dell said sales in its American consumer and British business customer lines was partly to blame for the shortfall....
ALMOST? AS POWERFUL!
STERNO!!!!! YOU'RE ALMOST AS POWERFUL AS YAHWEH!!!!!
Dell said sales in its American consumer and British business customer lines was partly to blame for the shortfall....
ALMOST? AS POWERFUL!
So! THE CONSPIRACY sent FAKE NUMBERS to THE PAPER OF RE-CORD, which SWALLOWED THEM WHOLE!
Who'd have THOUGHT THE CONSPIRACY capable of such MENDACITY? Who'd have thought THE PAPER OF RE-CORD capable of such GULLIBILITY?
Not US!
Who'd have THOUGHT THE CONSPIRACY capable of such MENDACITY? Who'd have thought THE PAPER OF RE-CORD capable of such GULLIBILITY?
Not US!
CNN.com seems to be in a good mood today:
• Truck hits hayride, killing 4
• Woman falls after dangling from hot air balloon
• Pastor electrocuted while performing baptism
[Fourth through sixth listings in "More News" on the home page]
News hacks should apologize for doing everything they can to avoid hard news, replacing it with misfortunes, bias and selling.
• Truck hits hayride, killing 4
• Woman falls after dangling from hot air balloon
• Pastor electrocuted while performing baptism
[Fourth through sixth listings in "More News" on the home page]
News hacks should apologize for doing everything they can to avoid hard news, replacing it with misfortunes, bias and selling.
The latest FAD among NEWS HACKS is to APOLOGIZE for being WRONG on IRAQ's WMDs. What they're doing is not apologizing for being wrong but for being wrong ON BEHALF OF A "CONSERVATIVE" CAUSE. Were this a LIBERAL cause there would be no apologies -- as there are seldom apologies for the REAL CRIMES NEWS HACKS FOREVER COMMIT ON OUR INTELLIGENCE.
Which will be the first newspaper to yell, "BUSH HAS NO RIGHT TO CHOOSE A CONSERVATIVE"?
Arts Groups Pessimistic Over Prospects for Culture Downtown
Look folks, there was little "culture" before Osama. What your neighborhood needs is what it used to have -- jobs, commercial jobs, retailing jobs, not all sorts of jobs knocking America or sitting on its behinds or pleasing THE LORD GOD PINCH.
Face it, doesn't New York have enough ARTS as it is?
Look folks, there was little "culture" before Osama. What your neighborhood needs is what it used to have -- jobs, commercial jobs, retailing jobs, not all sorts of jobs knocking America or sitting on its behinds or pleasing THE LORD GOD PINCH.
Face it, doesn't New York have enough ARTS as it is?
Dubya chooses someone the movement likes -- and what's more, he's a MAN, which means NEWS HACKS will be MONUMENTALLY JUSTIFIED in going after him, regardless of how qualified he is -- and you can bet they'll try to make him as UNQUALIFIED as possible.
Conservatives and Republicans must learn to rule America WITHOUT the help of NEWS HACKS and their FRIENDS, because they can do NOTHING to please them, and EVERYTHING to ANNOY them. And if NEWS HACKS and their FRIENDS scream and cry and tell mommy -- so be it.
Conservatives and Republicans must learn to rule America WITHOUT the help of NEWS HACKS and their FRIENDS, because they can do NOTHING to please them, and EVERYTHING to ANNOY them. And if NEWS HACKS and their FRIENDS scream and cry and tell mommy -- so be it.
I must confess I'm up this morning just to make sure our local ill-begotten transit authority is shut down today. Both sides wanted this strike: the transit union because it didn't want to give up its health benefits, their bosses because they didn't want to pay them. Now they're fighting with "statements" and the equivalent of expelling gas loudly in close quarters. Forgive me for saying both sides deserve to go to hell. I'm sure traffic will be horrendous today, but after the first few days things will sort themselves out, and by the time they settle this thing (in two months) the transit authority will be much poorer in its revenue stream, and the workers will have to give up some of their benefits anyway, and both sides will have earned not undying enmity from the public, but something worse -- indifference.
THE USEFULNESS OF ARTSJOURNAL.COM: A writer for The Observer asks what became of theater critics. Had he paid attention to this sometimes annoying site he'd have found his answer from FT, which ran a bubbly press release for Les Miz. 3,000 AMATEUR PRODUCTIONS! WOW!!!!! And here is why we no longer have critics: the modern NEWS HACK mistakes popularity for excellence, when he deigns to acknowledge excellence at all. That the critic has been replaced by the above-the-title ad-blurbist is also a function of the larger culture, where "Olivier, Ashcroft, Richardson, Gielgud, Dench, the Redgraves, Gambon, Walter, Sher, Russell Beale and McCrory" have been replaced by ciphers. Why bother writing knowledgably on culture when the culture has no respect for itself anyway? You just do what most blurbists do: transcribe the first echo that resounds in your empty head. Part of the problem too is that a certain aesthete like our Observer scribbler must champion THE SHOCK OF THE NEW, which in practice means sticking it in the public's face again and again until its face is black and blue; hence the idiot championing of [C]RAPPERS and movies directed with meat cleavers. Plainly people are tired of ATTITUDE, but the HACKS aren't.
Sunday, October 30, 2005
When will overpaid keepers of the CW like SKNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNX realize their typing acts as a reverse psychological trigger and that everything they praise turns to dross?
The problem is Halloween turned from a reasonably innocent festival into an industry, and when it turned into an industry it lost its much of charm and sense of humor. (Part of it too was the BOOMERS remaking it into another warped self-conscious excuse to relive their childhood.) Hence the beauty of little kids dressing up in weird costumes was replaced with intolerance and finger pointing, as with much that becomes an industry.
Can't we just forget about politics and let the kids exercise their imaginations?
[I]ts sometimes-dark imagery - and the gory movies and masks that go along with it - mean that some Christian and Muslim families keep their kids at home that day.
I think this merits a special THANK YOU to DR. EVIL!!!!!
Can't we just forget about politics and let the kids exercise their imaginations?
[I]ts sometimes-dark imagery - and the gory movies and masks that go along with it - mean that some Christian and Muslim families keep their kids at home that day.
I think this merits a special THANK YOU to DR. EVIL!!!!!
I SUPPOSE Little Malcolm may have an excuse when he says people are curious about this sort of thing, but when he engages in "guesstimations" (and broad ones they have to be) isn't he helping to make people believe even less of what they read from NEWS HACKS?
"(They're) not being written for the traditional 13-year-old boy any more, but for a 40-year-old who wants to read what he read when he was 13. He still wants the Legion of Super-Heroes, but he wants it to be more adult." Birkemoe smiles and shrugs. "But it's still the Legion of Super-Heroes ... It's still all guys in tights pounding each other."
The eulogy for the comic book.
The eulogy for the comic book.
Hed of the Day, on USAOKAY!!!!!'s home page:
Reid: Apologize
That's right Reid, APOLOGIZE.
Well taken, USAOKAY!!!!! (Pffh-hh-hh!)
Reid: Apologize
That's right Reid, APOLOGIZE.
Well taken, USAOKAY!!!!! (Pffh-hh-hh!)
THE PAPER OF RE-CORD PROSTRATES ITSELF BEFORE THE EIGHTH WONDER OF THE WORLD -- and SLASHDOT'S GEEKS will have none of it:
Don't forget about all the fraudulent clicks ey... It seems like they're having [joelonsoftware.com] a [webpronews.com] lot [webpronews.com] of [cnn.com] problems [theregister.co.uk] with those...
I remember, a day or two after Katrina, trying to track down a few friends who had fled New Orleans, and when reading my email thread in gmail I was offered a great deal on a travel package to the historic French quarter. :)
It figures that one of the most sophisticated AIs ever developed would find its use in advertising.
Shouldn't this posting be titled: Smarter Google Ads Targets Stupid People Better.
And there will be MORE, to be SURE, but I don't have all day with SLASHDOT.
Don't forget about all the fraudulent clicks ey... It seems like they're having [joelonsoftware.com] a [webpronews.com] lot [webpronews.com] of [cnn.com] problems [theregister.co.uk] with those...
I remember, a day or two after Katrina, trying to track down a few friends who had fled New Orleans, and when reading my email thread in gmail I was offered a great deal on a travel package to the historic French quarter. :)
It figures that one of the most sophisticated AIs ever developed would find its use in advertising.
Shouldn't this posting be titled: Smarter Google Ads Targets Stupid People Better.
And there will be MORE, to be SURE, but I don't have all day with SLASHDOT.
1,571 WORDS to say what I said in FOURTEEN: Why do I get the idea in the Windy City they're not that excited?
Now we'll confess we like sexy babes as much as the next man, but is it, er, REALISTIC to expect to find them on a Web dating service?
Excellent news; The BEEEEEEEEE-OOOOOOOOOO was down again (not so much as we'd like, but we'll take it), and but for the SLIME that oozed to the MARKET LEADER it would have been down SHARPLY, just as the MARKET LEADER will be down SHARPLY NEXT WEEK.
Also, it appears six of the top ten may not earn back their production costs. BETTER!
And SHUCKS, DOOM went down ONLY by 73.8 PERCENT. How ya gonna bring Goodthings to THAT number, PLASTIC MAN?
Interesting: CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGE doesn't mention it, thus once again practicing that SUPREME NEWS-HACK DICTUM: If the PUBLIC DOESN'T KNOW, it DOESN'T HAVE TO KNOW.
P. S. THE UNDER-17-UNACCOMPANIED-BY-A-PARENT SLIME.
Also, it appears six of the top ten may not earn back their production costs. BETTER!
And SHUCKS, DOOM went down ONLY by 73.8 PERCENT. How ya gonna bring Goodthings to THAT number, PLASTIC MAN?
Interesting: CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGE doesn't mention it, thus once again practicing that SUPREME NEWS-HACK DICTUM: If the PUBLIC DOESN'T KNOW, it DOESN'T HAVE TO KNOW.
P. S. THE UNDER-17-UNACCOMPANIED-BY-A-PARENT SLIME.
I confess I'm of more than two minds about the reconstruction of that magnificent church in Drseden. On the one hand it's a grand thing to know it's been rebuilt; on the other hand the church's very "pockmarks" and the dark ghostly presence of an original wall must remind people that it has been rebuilt, and therefore it's not quite the same. And I suppose with 60 years hindsight we should probe our consciences that we destroyed such a landmark. On the other hand, that scum like "Doctor Death" still evades justice tells us why we had to do it. Nonetheless its very reconstruction after too long is a symbol of reconciliation -- and reunification -- with the hope that never again will Europe be bombed by the sons of Europe, or anyone else.
STRANGE BEDFELLOWS:
Consider the case of Brent Scowcroft. According to last week's New Yorker, former president Bush has tried to arrange a meeting between his old national-security adviser (and best friend) and his son. But after Scowcroft wrote a 2002 op-ed piece titled "Don't Attack Saddam," the president has consistently refused his own father's request. Now we know that Bush's lack of curiosity has proved fatal.
SO -- the guy who licked the Chinese shoes after Tiananmen is now a GOOD GUY. Yep, one or two more scribblings like this and we WILL make fun of your HAIR.
Consider the case of Brent Scowcroft. According to last week's New Yorker, former president Bush has tried to arrange a meeting between his old national-security adviser (and best friend) and his son. But after Scowcroft wrote a 2002 op-ed piece titled "Don't Attack Saddam," the president has consistently refused his own father's request. Now we know that Bush's lack of curiosity has proved fatal.
SO -- the guy who licked the Chinese shoes after Tiananmen is now a GOOD GUY. Yep, one or two more scribblings like this and we WILL make fun of your HAIR.
Another J'ACCUSE for the HACKS:
Two American soldiers have been charged with allegedly assaulting two detainees at a U.S.-led coalition base in southern Afghanistan, the military said Sunday.
But goshdarnit, not EVERYTHING can go the HACKS' WAY:
The announcement came 10 days after the U.S. military launched an investigation into allegations that some American troops allegedly burned the bodies of two Taliban rebels slain in battle, an act that purportedly was caught on video by an embedded freelance cameraman and broadcast on television.
Cremation of corpses is banned in Islam and the alleged desecration sparked outrage in Afghanistan. Some Islamic clerics warned of a violent anti-American backlash, but so far there have no demonstrations.
JEEZ, you'd think the AFGHANIS would KNOW BETTER. They'd get LOTS OF SUPPORT from NEWS HACKS.
Two American soldiers have been charged with allegedly assaulting two detainees at a U.S.-led coalition base in southern Afghanistan, the military said Sunday.
But goshdarnit, not EVERYTHING can go the HACKS' WAY:
The announcement came 10 days after the U.S. military launched an investigation into allegations that some American troops allegedly burned the bodies of two Taliban rebels slain in battle, an act that purportedly was caught on video by an embedded freelance cameraman and broadcast on television.
Cremation of corpses is banned in Islam and the alleged desecration sparked outrage in Afghanistan. Some Islamic clerics warned of a violent anti-American backlash, but so far there have no demonstrations.
JEEZ, you'd think the AFGHANIS would KNOW BETTER. They'd get LOTS OF SUPPORT from NEWS HACKS.
THE EBAY ZILLIONAIRE who would CHANGE AMERICA by LECTURING PEOPLE is now making a movie about the EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL FAST-FOOD BIZ. BUT:
In recent years, the Skoll Foundation, which shares Participant's commitment to social change (though it has no direct ties to the film company), has had its own encounters with the fast food industry - as an investor. According to its tax statement for the year ending Nov. 30, 2003, the foundation's $161 million in assets included $1.3 million worth of shares in fast food companies and their suppliers. Holdings included Yum! Brands (which claims to be the world's largest fast food restaurant company and includes Pizza Hut, KFC, Taco Bell and other chains), Kraft Foods, Cadbury-Schweppes, Coca-Cola, Pepsi Bottling Group, and Aramark, a vending machine company.
Mr. Skoll, who is the foundation's chairman as well as the founder and chief executive of Participant, said, "I don't see a conflict between these investments and our intent with 'Fast Food Nation.'" The film, he said, is "intended to educate consumers about industry-wide practices, not pick on the practices of any specific company."
The foundation's president and chief executive, Sally Osberg, defended the foundation's investment strategy. "It's only inconsistent on the surface," she said.
So long as our MOUTHS are in the right place.
In recent years, the Skoll Foundation, which shares Participant's commitment to social change (though it has no direct ties to the film company), has had its own encounters with the fast food industry - as an investor. According to its tax statement for the year ending Nov. 30, 2003, the foundation's $161 million in assets included $1.3 million worth of shares in fast food companies and their suppliers. Holdings included Yum! Brands (which claims to be the world's largest fast food restaurant company and includes Pizza Hut, KFC, Taco Bell and other chains), Kraft Foods, Cadbury-Schweppes, Coca-Cola, Pepsi Bottling Group, and Aramark, a vending machine company.
Mr. Skoll, who is the foundation's chairman as well as the founder and chief executive of Participant, said, "I don't see a conflict between these investments and our intent with 'Fast Food Nation.'" The film, he said, is "intended to educate consumers about industry-wide practices, not pick on the practices of any specific company."
The foundation's president and chief executive, Sally Osberg, defended the foundation's investment strategy. "It's only inconsistent on the surface," she said.
So long as our MOUTHS are in the right place.
I wouldn't do that, RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE PAPER OF RE-CORD could always come back at YOU -- and YOU'RE OLDER.
And for all THAT:
Indeed, not one person interviewed for this article thinks he'll be forced to offer up anything more severe than the "culpas" already dispensed.
ONCE a GOD, ALWAYS a GOD.
Hed of the Week from the FREEP:
War blamed as 6,000 quit Territorial Army (UK's National Guard - What's with Murdoch's Press?)
War blamed as 6,000 quit Territorial Army (UK's National Guard - What's with Murdoch's Press?)
Not a good day for the weekly dishrags: Mr. Mark has L'AFFAIRE WHO CARESzzzzzzzzzzzz and the TWXSTERS have put a totally inscrutable black-and-white cover on PEOPLE NEWSMAGAZINE (the story isn't even up on their Web site yet); newsstand sales won't be good THIS week. Even TOILETBOWL's EXCLUSIVE PLUG for ESPNCORP's Christian CGI fantasy is muted. What gives with you guys? We expect PATRIOTISM on Sunday mornings -- and SELLING! Oh well, GO GET 'EM NEXT TIME.