Posted 4:41 PM by Gene

And it's not just the ASSPress and Al:

Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin plunged into the depths of Lake Baikal aboard a mini-submersible on Saturday in a mission that adds a new dimension to his macho image.

Why must YANGDOM post so much rubbish?



A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD (Political Division) to GLEB! And Washington Life, did you NEED to caption this?

Posted 4:28 PM by Gene

Serving notice that it will aggressively tap the sucke -- its resources, Microhoo!, with the help of its partner GE BANCORP, electrically informs the world that Kanye is NOT the New King of Pop.

Why couldn't YANGDOM and LEHMAN BROTHERS trade places?

(GE BANCORP permalink here, for when Microhoo! deletes its [Warning: Annoying music video starts up])

Posted 4:16 PM by Gene

This is a celebrity profile. Why do we need a celebrity profile of Al Franken? Don't we all know who he is? Haven't we had enough puff pieces, regardless of the occupation?

While Franken generally has tried to keep a low profile, he has picked his spot.

At a lunch with Democrats on Thursday, Franken had what spokeswoman Jess McIntosh described as "a lively discussion" with T. Boone Pickens....

Con-SER-va-tives all but called it a "meltdown", but an ASSPress hack calling it "picking your spot" is every bit of slippery too.



A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD (Political Division) to HANK!

Posted 1:28 PM by Gene

They're Winning
Why is China's stimulus working so much better than ours?

Well, maybe because China is a totalitarian state -- not that a few liberals haven't dreamed of that.

Posted 1:22 PM by Gene

Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki said on Saturday his government could not afford to pay General Electric for its services and rebuked parliament for failing to allow a $3 billion bond sale.

Does Very Very Littler Jeffy have access to dunning agencies?

We are not kidding.

Posted 12:59 PM by Gene

Next time Roy, just type, "I hate Jews." You'll feel MUCH better, and you'll save your readers the trouble of the irony act.

Only try not to do it too often.

Oh, and we -- appreciated "Sunday Show at Slipper Room". But why so many tattoos? Were folks trying to hide their -- identities? Oh and next time folks, could you skip the Al Gore impersonator?

Posted 9:01 AM by Gene

NUKEMAN and his buddies are putting opposition leaders on trial, meaning it must be time for the NEWS HACKS to devise another distraction. WACKO will be hard to top, but we have our confidence.

Posted 8:47 AM by Gene

Obama's favorite phrase: 'Let's be clear'

But Tricky Dick was perfectly.

Posted 8:27 AM by Gene

GEKKO KUDLOW, who told the tale of Goldilocks long after she escaped the BEARS, now says THE GREED-IS-GOOD GANG is BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!

And he said it on "7/31" at "3:570 P.M."! [Home-page SIC!]

What do GEKKO and JIM BOOM! BOOM! CRAMER have in common? Twenty guesses.

Posted 8:39 PM by Gene

Today MUST be -- yes it IS -- BANK FAILURE FRIDAY!

One was called Integrity Bank. PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!!!

Posted 6:04 PM by Gene

Corazon Aquino, who courageously trudged the Philippines out of the swamp of Marcos, has died. RIP.

Posted 5:08 PM by Gene

LAUGH OF THE DAY: Liar Liar Brock's on Fire challenges Lou "The Formerly-CEO-Fanny-Kissing Populist" Dobbs.

TRANSLATION: A LIAR FIGHTING A LIAR.

FURTHER TRANSLATION: CABLE NUISANCE NETWORK and Populist earn more money.

(Via the usual Romy)

Posted 3:02 PM by Gene

We know the gag: With Republicans it's caveat emptor, Madoffs run amok, no taxes for zillionaires, the sky's the limit for CEOs, the whole nine yards. With Democrats it's state control of business. Why can't these morons find some common ground?

Posted 9:32 AM by Gene

And speaking of The Paper, we have a suggestion, Sharon -- since SUPERNIKKI!!!!!!!!!! sold her site for SUPERZILLIONS!!!!!!!!!! you should do so too -- to the parent of PRNEWSWIRE.

A NEUHARTHISM OF THE MONTH AWARD TO DANNY!

Posted 9:30 AM by Gene

Few things are more annoying than when a keeper of the cultural CW like The Paper of Re-CORD emits a fulsome eulogy on a Cary Grant. "[I]t was impossible to imagine Grant in the macho action and crime films that were beginning to dominate Hollywood. It’s equally impossible to imagine him in the soggy, misogynistic, stealth-macho geekfests that pass for romantic comedy now." And how many of these impossible movies have we raved over the years? Not too long ago A. O. told us of his "wide-eyed arm-waving enthusiasm" for all manner of junk -- and now you get all teary-eyed for somebody who died in 1986?

Hey, maybe you folks ought to put up a pay wall.

Posted 9:07 AM by Gene

Although the latest data are "less worse" than in prior months, the severity of the recent recession came into sharp focus because this is the first time since the Great Depression that the economy contracted for four consecutive quarters.

We ask again -- why are people calling this an ECONOMY?

Posted 4:13 PM by Gene

Exxon Profits Plunge on Lower Oil Prices

Those who live by the double-edged sword....

Posted 4:08 PM by Gene

Here we are, VERY VERY LITTLE JEFFY, GOLDY does this big favor for you, so what happens? You say you'll need more CAPITAL if the economy worsens, and you take 100 points off the Casino's high in an hour. Some friend of Wall Street YOU are!

Posted 3:44 PM by Gene

Britain has its knighthoods, we have the Medal of Freedom. There's little difference; both smack of rank flattery. This year His Omnipotence the Professor has made it an excuse for PC, with a dead Republican thrown in to prove we're still bipartisan. (Will you cut the comedy, Your Omnipotence?) The organizer of Durban gets a Medal too. We suspect eager young interns chose most of the names, passed the list to His Omnipotence, who scanned it for three seconds and said, "I'm cool." When do the interns finally get him in trouble?

Posted 10:40 AM by Gene

Now that THE RECESSION IS OVER!!!!!!!!!!, when does all the money from the Wall Street Casino's buying psychosis finally trickle down?

Posted 9:07 AM by Gene

AOL Newsroom Now Has (Wow) 1,500 Writers

Divided by how many millions of Web sites?

(Via IWantMedia)

Posted 8:50 AM by Gene

Goldman's greedmeisters give GE BANCORP permission to go bananas, meaning the whole Wall Street Casino goes bonkers.

And they have the center square of the House Financial Services Committee to thank!

Posted 8:47 AM by Gene

"Extreme" fighting is to cable what pro wrestling was to early broadcast television, except for the zillions. So this "sport" can fill "700 hours...a year" of SUMNER's airtime. So what? It's still filler.

Posted 8:43 AM by Gene

An earmark "foe" had his own earmark. Can we trust anyone among our Beltway superiors?

Posted 8:40 AM by Gene

TRANSLATION: LUKE SPIELBERG's remaking Dean Martin movies. Repeat the word "dark" a thousand times and He's still remaking Dean Martin movies. How can any ad-blurbist say movies are better than ever?

But who better to create a franchise's footprint than the most commercially successful director on the planet? [Two buzzwords in one sentence!]

How successful has He been lately?

Posted 9:50 PM by Gene

Well, we now know why all that PEOPLE WARNER DVD product was going for so little at Big Lots -- it may have been stolen.

Now I don't feel quite so bad.

(Via DVDTalk)

Posted 9:03 PM by Gene

HA! HA! HA! A HASBRO FILMS TENTPOLE is about to become "'THE WORST MOVIE OF THE YEAR'"!

Posted 8:25 PM by Gene

Behold this slide show from Florida's Gold Coast and I'd dare the beholder to say we're not in a depr -- an ECONOMY.

(Originated here)

Posted 6:24 PM by Gene

ARCHDaily!





What IS with STARCHITECTS and their obsessions? Why this sudden mania for bridges to nowhere?

Oh, that second "bridge" is a sledding slope for kids. What about the rest of the year? Does it become a lover's leap?

Posted 3:46 PM by Gene

The fantasies did not stop when HISTORY'S GREATEST COMIC NOVELIST dreamt His Omnipotence would be A GREAT PRESIDENT because he could WRITE:

Charlize Theron's Denver and Delilah Films has acquired screen rights to Christopher Buckley's satirical novel "Florence of Arabia." Theron will produce and develop the film as a star vehicle.

Pic will be written by Dean Craig.

"Florence of Arabia" is about a State Dept. employee (to be played by Theron) who, after watching her friend marry the prince of a Middle East country and subsequently get executed, fights for equal rights for the women of that country.

Posted 3:05 PM by Gene

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has said the United States will restrict intelligence-sharing with the U.K. if a British court reveals secret details of a former Guantanamo Bay detainee's treatment, a British government lawyer said Wednesday.

Wait! Aren't the British doing the right thing?

Posted 10:02 AM by Gene

1. YANGDOM is still in second place. 2. Search now has two full-throttled empires of evil.

Posted 8:59 AM by Gene

Kenneth, on the job:

Rather suggests Obama set up a commission on public media and independent reporting (Usual Romy link)

Frequency also says, "At my age and stage I've finally reached the point where I don't have to kiss up to anybody. What a wonderful feeling it is."

Unlike five years ago?

Posted 8:43 AM by Gene

Shucks, The New Mae West's 9 to 5 theme park at Branson East is shutting down, meaning Mae will have to sell her overpriced trinkets at Dollywood.

Also ESPNCORP is shutting down its Little Mermaid theme park. What will all the newly unemployed roustabouts do?

Wait for the White Christmas theme park to open.

Posted 8:27 AM by Gene

Last night we were idly wondering what DVDs to buy next when we discovered Big Lots is helping PEOPLE WARNER dump its box sets. Most of them were HB junk but Looney Tunes Golden Collection sets 1 through 5 inclusive at $10 is enough to make one angry at paying $170 bucks for the same thing. Our nearest Big Lots is ten miles away and half the comments in chat boards said the typical store was out or overrun with eBay scorpions. (Or you had to drive to eight stores to find them. How much does that save?) Its Web site is also down. (Thank YOU!) We did snag a Popeye Vol. 1 for $8 from an Amazon.com merchant (including shipping), and we still felt lousy.

Big Lots might help explain why PEOPLE WARNER's revenues are down. (But the per-share earnings were way up based on the fairy-ta...sales...ANALYSTS' estimates, so the stock's up $50 today.)

Posted 8:22 AM by Gene

Forgive me, but I believe GEN. LEAK TWOFACE is the last person to speak of "adult supervision" -- and because he blathered to LARRY KING!!!!! he may not even know what an adult is.

Posted 5:28 PM by Gene

When two sound-alike pieces from CW sources document how mind-numbingly alike Hollywood's expulsions are the time has come to ditch our culture out the window.

(First piece via Newser. Hey Mike! Why make the links so hard to find?)

Posted 4:56 PM by Gene

ARCHDaily!



1. The world's biggest high-tech depilator -- OR...

2. The world's biggest high-tech bowling pin -- OR...

3. The world's biggest high-tech wine bottle that doubles as a radio!

AND:



TimmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmBERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

Posted 3:23 PM by Gene

There is something enviable about the utter lack of inhibition with which Leonard Bernstein carries on. His Symphony No. 3 (Kaddish) is a piece, in part, of such unashamed vulgarity, and it is so strongly derivative, that the hearing of it becomes as much as anything a strain on one's credulity. Can the narrator really have said "Do I have your attention, Majestic Father?" and did she declare to her God, "We are in this thing together now, you and I"?

Can anyone forty-five years later write music criticism remotely like this?

(Via AhtsJournal)

Posted 2:50 PM by Gene

Until I saw this picture of one of the "winners" on this reality show I didn't know it's been on the air in one or another form for eighteen seasons. How can something be on the air eighteen seasons and not leave a mark? Ed Sullivan was on for more than two decades and he left a mark. Heck SNL, the partially embalmed corpse of satire, has been on for thirty-four years and we know of all its overdoses. Even Matt can say he's done licensing deals. But this? And the finale probably didn't draw more than four percent of America. When something can be on for eighteen seasons and so few notice it means 1. People are turning off television, however much they turn it on; and 2. The American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers is virtually paying for NOTHING.

Posted 2:47 PM by Gene

Another reason SUPERNIKKI!!!!! is a national resource:

USC Law Taps Former Warner Bros' John Schulman To Start Showbiz Law Program

Posted 9:14 AM by Gene

OUTSTANDING NEWS:

Michigan health care jobs top manufacturing

RENDELLISM FOREVER!

Posted 8:40 AM by Gene

We've noted earlier that in our neighborhood BankofGovernmentofAmerica has been hammering and sawing and chiseling and painting its way into a brand spanking-new bank to replace one up the street, presumably on our development money. Well wouldn't you know, Ken Lewis wants to close ten percent of BofGofA's branches. That wouldn't include the one you're moving into, huh Ken? Bet it would.

Posted 9:13 PM by Gene

Newsweek's Obama Correspondent Joins Administration

Say what?

Posted 8:00 PM by Gene

Our excuse for posting this Daily Mail photo is if people will come here solely for pictures of naked women I don't want them to go away too mad; besides, I'd much rather look at them than THE MAN's "protruding muscles and bulging veins".

Posted 5:52 PM by Gene

Okay -- time to steal copper wiring again!

Although at least the non-speculators are leaving our FOOD alone -- for now.

Posted 5:26 PM by Gene

ARCHDaily!



What's that cross doing in the square igloo?

Posted 5:18 PM by Gene

No, SUMNER will DIE before He gives up control of VIACON (and we all know SUMNER WON'T DIE), and no, VERY VERY LITTLER JEFFY would rather turn politically incorrect than give up His show-biz schmoozing, but we can dream of Their empires' destruction, though it may not come.

(Links via IWantMedia)

Posted 5:16 PM by Gene

How many theological schools does America need, especially when so many have a tangential relation to God in the first place?

Posted 5:09 PM by Gene

TRANSLATION: These two zillionaire airheads inflict on the public what they wouldn't inflict upon themselves.



A DR. EVIL MEMORIAL AWARD to Cameron and Megan!

Posted 3:48 PM by Gene

Nate Silver crunches the numbers. It looks like Joe Sestak's primary challenge has made Specter a pretty loyal Democrat (which is what TNR was hoping for when we wrote this editorial).

Who knew Tricky Dick and Machiavelli had such friends at TNR?

Posted 11:31 AM by Gene

It's time for our irregular feature: PLAYER ARRESTED!

DUI arrest fourth in 6 months for NDSU

BSU player charged with DUI, leaving scene of an accident

Bulldogs' offensive star cited for DUI

Add another to the Florida arrest total

We MUST do this more often!

Posted 11:05 AM by Gene

The dimwit Effete Edelstein, who all but vanished when he left Grate.com, has the guts to emote this about the Richard Brinsley Sheridan of the Age:

[I]t’s hard to feel sympathy for people who put so little soul into their work. Apatow has been around L.A. long enough to capture how showbiz males (especially Jewish) compete with one-liners: some good, most lame, many hostile....Funny People feels insular, as if Apatow’s whole world consists of nerdy jokesters who were angry, lonely kids who got rich beyond their dreams and f---ed women who’d never have talked to them in high school but are deep down still angry. [Sorry, I'm not SUPERADAM!!!!!!!!!! -- or Effete Edelstein.]

TRANSLATION: A highly self-regarding zillionaire can't do comedy worth a damn, but the ad-blurbists rave him to be in with the in-crowd.

The good news is magazines are losing ad revenues permanently too.

Posted 10:59 AM by Gene

Let me guess: Baltimore is a NO SNITCHIN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! zone.

Methinks our God in Chief should do something like visit that city one of these days rather than obsessing on his fellow professors.

Posted 10:49 AM by Gene

Somebody must be substituting for The Mogul's Friend because in the last two posts that somebody really let the biz have it. Hey PVT. ZELL! Whoever it is, hire the guy -- and have him replace Mogul's Friend!

Posted 9:58 AM by Gene

What was the point of building all those apartments in San Diego?

Posted 9:08 AM by Gene

"Our leadership team is so effective it is driving Republicans to distraction!!!!!" (Effective overemphasis added)

Say what, Queen Nancy?

Posted 8:29 PM by Gene

We repeat:

"All these tools of tech waste our time if we're not careful."

And where better to waste time than in the classroom, Bugmeister -- with OUR POWERPOINT?

Posted 8:11 PM by Gene

The HIP! HOT! double-murder in the HIP! HOT! apartment complex in a HIP! HOT! Philly neighborhood goes NATIONAL!

Still proud of your neighbor, cretins?

Posted 8:01 PM by Gene

Hey Em! When do you run this ad for the "free" game-spam?

Posted 7:39 PM by Gene

The best-laid plans of mice: People are stealing solar panels for the same reason people steal copper.

And they're also being stolen by marijuana growers, who are the last word in BROWNFIELDS.

Posted 7:33 PM by Gene

From a God who should know:

"All these tools of tech waste our time if we're not careful."

(Via Yahoo! "News")