Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

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Wednesday, February 26, 2003

Posted 6:39 PM by Gene

Did making all those phone calls leave us mean today? Tom DeLay is Snidely Whiplash minus the handlebars and the stove-pipe hat, and he shouldn't have dumped on Kosovo because Slick ran it. But Bill is so busy Conasoning and feeding his unquenchable rage that he doesn't tell us what he thinks. Is he against DeLay? Dubya? A war in Iraq? Or is he auditioning for Crossfire? The cute deceptive manner in which he lays into DeLay is a left cross at his own midsection. We can only think this kind of Terrible Tempered Mr. Bang would shut up like an army of antiwar protestors in Iraq when confronted with the drool of Sheryl Crow in Bosnia. Demagoguery and dishonesty -- the mark of a perfect news hack.

Sorry Bill, I take these insults to my intelligence personally.

By the way, what's Microsoft's policy on political activism on company time?

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