Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

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Tuesday, March 04, 2003

Posted 4:55 PM by Gene

If there's anyone I don't envy anyone in the news trade -- and I envy lots of people for making a million bucks per annum on a good month's work -- it's the "funny"-page editors. They get pilloried any time they cut somebody's favorite. And yet, who laughs at the "funnies" anymore? When they were supreme specimens of art it was one thing, but now they're just doodles, or refrigerator magnets, or merchandising, or intolerant, or they make political points not worth making -- and at their apex, as the CW writer Bob Garfield notes, they're The Family Circus, and you can't just say it's unfunny, you must say it out loud -- IT STINKS!! Bil, your Spoonerisms and non sequiturs were dated forty years ago! But then most comics have outlived their usefulness, and occasionally someone must get up the guts and ditch a couple, and the poor "funny"-page editor gets floods of phone calls and letters and e-mails for a thankless but necessary task. Here's one way every newspaper in America should emulate The New York Times.

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