THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Ladies and gentlemen, I've just received a phone call from Roman Polanski. I told Roman he waged a great campaign and am sorry only one of us could win an Oscar®. We all wish him the best of luck and I would certainly invite him to join me as we endeavor to win future Oscars®. Academy® Members, my fellow Americans, tonight is a victory for GREAT MOVIEMAKING!!!!! And I want to assure you, as I accept this high honor, this noble statuette, that I intend to keep on fighting for the right to WIN OSCARS®!!!!! And I also want to say, I couldn't have done it without the help of Harvey! Together we can keep on keeping on, working for the common good of all mankind, as we pursue the grand goal of WINNING MORE OSCARS®!!!!!!!!!!