Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

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Sunday, August 31, 2003

Posted 9:01 AM by Gene

I have given up trying to get truth from news hacks on subjects like this. BLUNDER has spent the last six months badmouthing our Iraq campaign, and Norman Thomas's grandson famously said the CIA was near mass suicide because the BEEB (most likely) told it the STREET was about to rise. This article ends with the foregone conclusion that Afghanistan is a goner. Best to think the worst about Osama, to fend off an unpleasant surprise, but we'll never know from the hermetically-sealed luxury news suites at BuffettMedia.

Two other reasons not to trust this story: BLUNDER's sources are the Taliban, and the first word of the headline is "Rumors." Wasn't BLUNDER's gaseous editor Mark whining to Lord Koppel of Eisner after L'Affaire Blair that nobody believes us?

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