Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Thursday, August 14, 2003

    Posted 8:32 AM by Gene

    News hacks in St. Paul are excited that 16,000 people attended the local Nitwits Nudism and Navel-Staring Festival. (I've been to ArtsJournal.com again grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!) WELL, 16,000 people is the equivalent to TEN sellouts on Broadway, and forty-thousand admissions wouldn't fill two days' worth of screenings at a gigaplex. But because Ed Rendell and the news hacks are enamored over such artistic onanism, we're stuck with it -- until somebody points out these naked theatre emperors are wearing threadbare clothes.

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