Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Friday, August 01, 2003

    Posted 6:43 AM by Gene

    Orgasmically raving movie ad-blurb copywriters helped make the gross-out comedy indestructible, and now in typical news hack fashion the blurbists are deploring the fact even while denying they had anything to do with it. With their philistinism, trend chasing and reverse snobbery news hacks have done more than any party save JACK to ruin our culture, but of course will NEVER take responsibility, except in the fake symbolic PR manner of closing the barn door after the horse manure has bolted out.

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