Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

    Blogroll Me!

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    Wednesday, November 26, 2003

    Posted 7:02 PM by Gene

    The two sides of USA OKAY -- the Web site, that is (like father, like son):

    MAYO CLINIC OFFICIAL PREDICTS WORST FLU SEASON IN 30 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    BRITNEY SPEARS ALBUM DEBUTS AT NO. 1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    This is what Buzz T. Newhouse may have had in mind when he complained about TV news,

    I can skip that stupid busiest-travel-day-of-the-year story today. And I can skip those stupid busiest-shopping-days-of-the-year on Friday and the day after Christmas. I'll also skip most city-digs-out-after-blizzard stories, thank you. And I'll admit that I'm not getting much out of the conjoined-twins-separated-in-long-and-risky-operation stories, either.

    This, of course, isn't really news. Neither is much of USA OKAY.

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