Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

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Sunday, December 21, 2003

Posted 3:40 PM by Gene

MORE EXTREMELY CLEVER NEWSHACKERY: "Some Israeli Reservists Refuse to Serve!!!!!!!!!", yells the headline. Now you'd think some means A LOT, but as Curley's (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) Stooge says, it's only thirteen, and as he further sheepishly admits (halfway down), "The 13 signatories represent a tiny fraction of the unit." Of ONE unit. Nonetheless, the good deed has been done, and there is PROFOUND DISSENSION in Israel's armed forces.

Somebody definitely had someone like Curley's (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) Stooges in mind when he said, "The enemy of our enemy is our friend." With friends like these who needs enemy's enemies?

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