Eugene David<br>...The One-Minute Pundit

Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

8/28/11 - 9/4/11

8/21/11 - 8/28/11

8/14/11 - 8/21/11

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7/31/11 - 8/7/11

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2/22/04 - 2/29/04

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2/1/04 - 2/8/04

1/25/04 - 2/1/04

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1/11/04 - 1/18/04

1/4/04 - 1/11/04

12/28/03 - 1/4/04

12/21/03 - 12/28/03

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11/2/03 - 11/9/03

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9/21/03 - 9/28/03

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8/31/03 - 9/7/03

8/24/03 - 8/31/03

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8/3/03 - 8/10/03

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7/20/03 - 7/27/03

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6/29/03 - 7/6/03

6/22/03 - 6/29/03

6/15/03 - 6/22/03

6/8/03 - 6/15/03

6/1/03 - 6/8/03

5/25/03 - 6/1/03

5/18/03 - 5/25/03

5/11/03 - 5/18/03

5/4/03 - 5/11/03

4/27/03 - 5/4/03

4/20/03 - 4/27/03

4/13/03 - 4/20/03

4/6/03 - 4/13/03

3/30/03 - 4/6/03

3/23/03 - 3/30/03

3/16/03 - 3/23/03

3/9/03 - 3/16/03

3/2/03 - 3/9/03

2/23/03 - 3/2/03

2/16/03 - 2/23/03

2/9/03 - 2/16/03

2/2/03 - 2/9/03

1/26/03 - 2/2/03

1/19/03 - 1/26/03

1/12/03 - 1/19/03

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

Blogroll Me!

Sunday, April 18, 2004

Posted 7:20 AM by Gene

It's amazing what you can learn from those computers at Google News. For instance, I've learned the problem with THE MEDIA isn't indecency -- it's CONCENTRATION (a code word for all them EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL LOWSY MAYS REPUBLICANS, who are EEEEEEEEEEEVIL because they're REPUBLICANS). I also learned that while HOWIE is "leering, infantile, sexually perverse," he's also a "CIVIL LIBERTARIAN!!!!!!!!!!"

I learned one other thing. Most NEWS HACKS and EXPERTS put their brains in safe-deposit boxes before writing.

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