Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

Saturday, April 24, 2004


While many news hacks smirked and said, "Serves the guy right for quitting his day job," CURLEY's (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) Stooges managed to find us a true -- HERO. A MOTHER TERESA.

Who needs scandals in the news biz when you've got CURLEY? (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!)

P. S. NO, I will NOT apologize. Here's Andy "Where's My Meds?" Rooney from two weeks ago:

Treating soldiers fighting their war as brave heroes is an old civilian trick designed to keep the soldiers at it.

One must charitably suppose Andy was being ironic; he served in the war and worked on Stars and Stripes. But he's also a NEWS HACK, a SUPERZILLIONAIRE NEWS HACK, he works for VIACON, he works in a notoriously LIBERAL division of VIACON, and he was dictating a piece urging us to cut and run from Iraq. We know what cynics NEWS HACKS are; we know of their depthless contempt for the audience disguised as PUBLIC SERVICE, and of their predilection for black humor behind the curtain, much of which they play out on US. I DO NOT APOLOGIZE.

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