Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Tuesday, August 17, 2004

    Posted 5:06 PM by Gene

    I remember Crazy Guggenheim too. (Although Larry Miller spoils the effect with that enduring news-hack cliche "innocence": a nation that went through two wars and a depression in three decades, that had already fought the Cold War for another two, probably didn't have much innocence left.) I remember the entertainers who knotted America together by the sheer force of their talent. Alas, Jackie Gleason and Frank Fontaine are clinking glassses in that great bar in the sky -- replaced by people like The Weekly Standard's proprietor RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and FX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (That rather spoils the effect too.)

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