THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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"I've had a lot less enjoyment from my gold medal because of this," Hamm says. "I had one day of pure jubilation, the day after the all-around, and then my world fell apart."....
He already has appeared on the Late Show with David Letterman, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, The View, Today, Good Morning America, the CBS Early Show and CNN.
Still waiting in line to get him: Jimmy Kimmel Live, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Last Call with Carson Daly, Saturday Night Live, Mad TV and ABC's 20/20....
He's accepting motivational speaking engagements at $15,000 a pop.
He's OK'ing a walk-on role with Morgan on the new FOX series "Quintuplets."
He's getting ready to audition for a Calvin Klein underwear ad.
He's on tap with Morgan to meet the Bush twins, Jenna and Barbara.
He's mulling book deals — the working title is "My Greek Week."
TRANSLATION: WHINY CRYBABY, SHUT UP.