Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Friday, October 22, 2004

    Posted 5:23 PM by Gene

    Here's MY idea of a campaign song (to the tune, as usual, of "Wintergreen for President"):

    MICHAEL BAD for President!
    MICHAEL BAD for President!
    He's the man the dweebies choose!
    Loves the druggies and the booze!

    (Etc., etc., etc.)

    Well, he's a GLIBERTARIAN, isn't he?

    Now if only we could work on a song for his running mate, whose name rhymes with lasagna.

    P. S. Is it me or does he have a slight resemblance to ANOTHER MICHAEL?

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