THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!
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Are we in the golden age of video gaming? (Can you hear THE VOICE OF AL screaming, WE ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?)
OR:
"If games were movies, we (have) Star Wars, Titanic, Toy Story, Casablanca and Gone With the Wind all (hitting) at the same time," says John Davison, editorial director for Ziff-Davis video game publications.
Star Wars, Titanic, Toy Story...That should be enough.
JOHN! You looking for a job at GanNETt? They'd LOVE to have you!
OR:
More than a few of the 1.5 million who put down a deposit for [Halo 2] months in advance took days off work to play it.
It was well worth it to Craig Askew [SIC], 33, of Henderson, N.C., who has been waiting for Halo 2 since he finished the original three years ago. He played more than 25 hours the first week the game was out, including most of Wednesday, a day he had arranged to take off from his truck-driving job. Last week, he put in another 10 hours, plus more than 12 on Sunday.
Askew says he didn't specify why he needed the time off. Taking a day off work "to spend some time playing Halo 2 is very unusual for me. The quality of this game is second to none. My HDTV and I have never been this happy playing games." [We're so GLAD you're in love, Craig.]
Others simply called in sick.
TRANSLATION: GET A LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!