Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

Front page



THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

Blogroll Me!

[Powered by Blogger]

Monday, November 15, 2004

Posted 4:55 PM by Gene

On my weekday sojourn to work I pass a ticket agency. Looking at the acts -- WWE RAW!!!!! NEMO ON ICE!!!!! -- I thought, has the NHL lockout (NHL? What's an NHL?) hurt other overpriced attractions? It must send a signal: who wants to spend $200 on no-talents or hoodlums with AAAAAAATTITUUUUUUUUUDE!!!!! (and sometimes both) ? Our local NBA mediocrity the 76ers is doing a dollars-off tray-liner stunt at Mickey D's -- and they STILL CHARGE TOO MUCH. If we can live without the goons why can't we live without the tattooed girlie-men of b-ball, or the whining rock nobodies, or the fake circuses and Ice Follies? Why must we waste our money on fifth-rate arena show biz?

Speaking thereof, the bus-and-truck company of Thoroughly Modern Millie now parked at the Academy of Music Gas-'n'-Go Truck Stop has painted a logo on its big rig. WOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!!!!! I'd bet one in a thousand can name the people who wrote its "songs." (No, Cahn and Van Heusen DON'T COUNT.)

Home
Site Meter eXTReMe Tracker