Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Tuesday, December 07, 2004

    Posted 5:21 PM by Gene

    I don't know who "DJ Drummond" is, but I DO know he's a SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGER, and I also know that reading 1,012 words criticizing E. J. "Who? MOI?" Dionne, Andy S. and Nicholas "Advanced Stage" von Hoffman is, if not a total waste of time, certainly very close, as they all write self-parody, and self-parody is beneath contempt. But SUPERDUPERMEGAGIGABLOGGERS must ALWAYS pile on the contempt, because THUS is the way to IMMORTAL STARDOM.

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