Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Posted 7:05 AM by Gene

"Slither slither slither slither went the tongue....But the hand, that was what she tried to concentrate on, the hand, since it has the entire terrain of her torso to explore and not just the otorhinolaryngological caverns -- oh God, it was not just at the border where the flesh of the breast joins the pectoral sheath of the chest --no, the hand was cupping her entire right -- Now! She must say 'No, Hoyt' and talk to him like a dog...."

Yes I think prose like this DOES deserve an award, don't you?

"Ghastly and boring," said the award presenters. TRANSLATION: Bad books can get published with "good" names.

P. S. The book's American cover:



The book's BRITISH cover:



Under these circumstances it would behoove those who've praised the book extravagantly because the author's CON-SER-VA-TIVE to SHUT UP.

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