Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Monday, January 03, 2005

    Posted 5:21 PM by Gene

    G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLEBLOGGER just SLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWED down again as the ZILLIONAIRE FREDDIE THE FREELOADERS in MOUNTAIN VIEW celebrated A NEW HIGH -- AND A PE of OVER 243!

    I don't care what the DOW 36,000s and the NEWS HACKS and the TECHIES and the con-SER-va-tives say, for this pile of sloth to be worth more than GM AND FORD COMBINED MAKES NO SENSE. The only good thing is VIACON NETWORK NEWS did an infomercial for the company, and one wonders if that isn't a kind of SI COVER JINX.

    P. S. Yes I know about THE CLUNKER BROTHERS, but at least they make CARS. G000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000GLE makes nothing but PAPER FORTUNES.

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