Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Sunday, January 23, 2005

Posted 2:56 PM by Gene

Johnny Carson has died. You have to wonder if he was show-biz' version of The Man who Wasn't There. He was unparalleled at topical jokes, and especially in ad-libbing his way out of an unfunny situation -- but what was he besides? It will not do to utter the cliche that he was a "private man"; as with MJ there probably wasn't much to him besides his jokes; he was, after all, a former game-show host. He didn't have personality enough to succeed in acting, nor business acumen enough to break beyond late-night. Oh well, he made America laugh, and if his jokes and even much of his manner are already forgotten, that's still an accomplishment.

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