THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Mr. Mark, ST. WARREN WILL DOUBLY BLESS YOU. Here we have nothing but ARTHOUSE PIC -- MASTERPIECES in contention for THE COVETED OSCAR®, and you, being the courageous JERNALIST that you are, decided to PUT THAT FACT ON THE COVER! This shows that our first allegiance is ALWAYS to OUR FELLOW JERNALISTS, for they believe as you do, not only does SHOW-BIZ know EVERYTHING (it being OUR SISTER BIZ -- we MUST NEVER FORGET THAT) but that WHATEVER a JERNALIST THINKS IS RIGHT, TRUE AND BEAUTIFUL ALWAYS IS! After ALL, these ARE MASTERPIECES, and who better to judge that fact than YOU JERNALISTS?
HALLELUJAH! to the GREATEST MAGAZINE EDITOR OF THE AGES -- ST. MARK!!!!! ST. WARREN's already cleared a place for you in Heaven.
And remember -- GET THOSE REPUBLICANS!!!!! (As you ALWAYS will.)
P. S. I recognize the guy on the right -- that's HOWARD HUGHES!!!!! -- but who are those other two? Maybe I'm just out of it. (Or maybe that's why we have PAT KINGSLEY as a CONTRIBUTING EDITOR.)