Posted 1:23 PM by Gene

Though it doesn't expire until the November issue I've already decided to let my subscription to The Atlantic Monthly lapse. Soon after the untimely death of Mike Kelly it became obvious the rag was declining into squoosh and trendiness. How many 100,000-word pieces on why (fill-in-the-blank) went wrong can one take anyway? The last straw was some scribble in the latest number by a pop-cul-TYURE fetishist named Carson subheaded "If Rupert's So Bad Why Is Fox So GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD?????" Just these words point to a fundamental conflict among America's news hacks: RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is unquestionably a force -- THE FORCE of EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL, the DEVIL with an Australian accent; but the children of the Trash-is-High-Art blurbists like PAULINE KAEL and the PAULETTES live in their own PLATINUM AGE of ENTERTAINMENT -- and RUPERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'s the source of most of it! Who knew GARBAGE could smell like -- ROSES????? So what to do faced with such a horrendous clash of forces? Of course -- let the dollar signs glow in your eyes. Simple enough when you're among AMERICA'S FOUNTS OF WISDOM. And a man who writes a novel starring the cast of Gilligan's Island (and for ESQUIRE, nuf said) is sure to believe ANYTHING.

I have HAD IT with the flacks, the toadies, the fan-clubbers, the drooling insiders, the sweet whisperers in entertainers' ears who write the show-biz pages, the adjectivists who speak day and night of GENIUS to justify DROSS, and their emptyheaded worldview, and their outrageous salaries and perks.