Eugene David<br>...The One-Minute Pundit

Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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2/1/04 - 2/8/04

1/25/04 - 2/1/04

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1/11/04 - 1/18/04

1/4/04 - 1/11/04

12/28/03 - 1/4/04

12/21/03 - 12/28/03

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11/2/03 - 11/9/03

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9/28/03 - 10/5/03

9/21/03 - 9/28/03

9/14/03 - 9/21/03

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8/31/03 - 9/7/03

8/24/03 - 8/31/03

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8/3/03 - 8/10/03

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6/22/03 - 6/29/03

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6/1/03 - 6/8/03

5/25/03 - 6/1/03

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5/11/03 - 5/18/03

5/4/03 - 5/11/03

4/27/03 - 5/4/03

4/20/03 - 4/27/03

4/13/03 - 4/20/03

4/6/03 - 4/13/03

3/30/03 - 4/6/03

3/23/03 - 3/30/03

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3/9/03 - 3/16/03

3/2/03 - 3/9/03

2/23/03 - 3/2/03

2/16/03 - 2/23/03

2/9/03 - 2/16/03

2/2/03 - 2/9/03

1/26/03 - 2/2/03

1/19/03 - 1/26/03

1/12/03 - 1/19/03

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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Sunday, July 24, 2005

Posted 11:47 AM by Gene

A-Myron A-Floren has a-died -- forgive us, but this is infinitely better than how the ignoramuses who are CURLEY'S (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) STOOGES put it: "'Lawrence Welk Show' Accordion Player Dies." He was a big part of the team that made musical meat-loaf on Saturdays, and if it was not great cuisine, it was still a kind of comfort food for the ears, and now we're stuck with GENIUS, and the whole world doesn't seem as good now.

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