Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Posted 4:58 PM by Gene

I suppose on one level we should be happy USAOKAY!!!!! finds space to devote 1,548 words (counting captions and credits) to cheerleading; that means the news is slow. On the other hand if USAOKAY!!!!! can devote 1,548 words to cheerleading it may also mean we do not live in an age of ferment. I find a slight relationship between OKAY!!!!! devoting so many words to cheerleading and the showy, forced ennui enveloping Hollywood, a drear that, unbeknownst to our superiors in that toxic landfill, is based on their lack of inspiration and talent.

As for cheerleading, isn't it a little late in the day to be talking about sex? The spectacularly unfunny National Lampoon ran a cover almost three decades ago.

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