Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Friday, September 23, 2005

Posted 5:51 PM by Gene

Now that THE GODDESS is back to waving her lucky finger and anointing critically-acclaimed unreadable tearjerkers, the hash-sloppers in the book biz are giddy with joy. Methinks they may be a little too giddy. I'd bet Her Holiness will probably not increase book sales, and if so only at the margins. Consider these alleged best sellers. Only a handful sold more than a million copies, and they were the usual gang of idiocies. The question which Her Holiness left unanswered is, why should I buy a novel? What could compel ME to slog through four hundred pages just so I can feel better? We forget that too much of book buying is a WOMAN THING, and that inevitably slants our culture away from pointed and biting and memorable stuff toward the simpering and the slosh. Perhaps if THE SENIOR CLUNKER BROTHER'S MARKETING DEPARTMENT gave ME a "FREE" CAR I might trudge through what is called fiction. I certainly wouldn't do it voluntarily.

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