Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

    Blogroll Me!

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    Friday, December 30, 2005

    Posted 6:24 PM by Gene

    Lately in surfing the Web (and especially tonight looking up things on Allmusic.com) I've been BOMBARDED by those EXASPERATING, IRRITATING, CALCULATING, AGITATING, MADDENING and INFURIATING ADS ABOUT TOENAIL FUNGUS. Anyone who thinks Web ads can't be as annoying as the worst TV conmmercials should consider the HAMMERHAMMERHAMMER approach these use to beat surfers into submission. They go back well over a year and have been especially plastered over ST. WARREN's properties (thus did I once call Slate.com TOENAIL.COM), and the disease shows no sign of abating. The ads are part of a campaign -- or rather, offensive -- for some prescription elixir called Lamisil, and it's made by a cretinous Swiss company called NOVARTIS -- it MUST be full of morons to constantly poking its middle finger (complete with diseased -- toenail?) in our eyes. If I had connections or luck I'd start a Web site blasting this Sherman's March of advertising into our lives. How does NovartisSucks.com sound? (That ship of fools probably owns it.)

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