Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Friday, December 30, 2005

    Posted 4:23 PM by Gene

    We don't know who's worse: the GREAT PLAYWRIGHT CHRIS-TO-PHER DURANG for writing this predictable display of Parkinson's-style twitching, or Andy S. for linking to it. The key term is "open-minded," which usually appears in the middle of ironically phrased blood-pressure-boosting polemics about the evil of the other guy.

    When it comes to talking about God both men could use a little of Abe's Second Inaugural. But that presupposes both men would benefit from any form of humility, and besides, it would pose a problem with Chris because he believes God's an it who largely serves the nefarious purposes of right-wing demagogues, and with Andy S. because he's immortal.

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