THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Clarkson has become a major star in the past year, with her hit "Since U Been Gone" earning both massive sales and critical respect....
Listen 300 Baud-er, you may think typing like that gets you into the Reporters' Hall of Fame, or whatever men's room they hang the awards in, but I don't like being talked down to like that, even if it's a specialty of you news hacks -- to treat us peons as though we don't exist, even if we inconveniently do, as you burn our advertising dollars and our cable fees and our subscriptions on your six-digit emoluments, and your atrocious writing. I guess just using words like "major" and "massive" and "critical respect" does the trick. Hey! I can do that too! I can say my blog is a major influence with a massive following and has earned critical respect among my fellow bloggers. Unfortunately it wouldn't make it any more true. A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK AWARD to YOU, 300 BAUD-ER, and SHUT UP.