Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Sunday, January 08, 2006

Posted 8:47 AM by Gene

Well, only one of the news rags took us up on our offer, and it chickened out -- it put the RED-STATE SCORPION on the cover. (Maybe they figured Snidely was TOO evil.) Mr. Mark put Ariel Sharon on, understandably enough, but it also put this caption above his photo: "Health for Life: Vitamins and Your Diet." Are you trying to tell him something after the fact, Mr. Mark? It does scratch its thick skull over JACKGATE, musing, "Can anything change the Capitol's money-hungry ways?" (The answer, needless to say, is no, unless you're a news hack, then the answer becomes no -- unless we sweep the Democrats into power.) Thankfully the House Committee on Standards of Official Conduct is on the case. "If they were going to investigate us, we were going to investigate them." Somebody should investigate they and we.

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