Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Wednesday, February 15, 2006

    Posted 8:26 AM by Gene

    While CURLEY'S (NYUK! NYUK! NYUK!) STOOGES work themselves into high blood pressure over the PERFIDY of the VICE-PRESIDENT, they get a chance to relax running another press release -- and raising OUR blood pressure.

    The song, which debuted Tuesday on Howard Stern's satellite radio show....

    A NEUHARTHISM OF THE WEEK TO ANOTHER ANONYMOUS HACK! Okay Curley, why is it we MUST know every last state secret but hiding your flacks with the no-byline gag is okay?

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