Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Friday, March 17, 2006

    Posted 8:41 AM by Gene

    Curley's (Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!) Stooges (with an eager assist from Greg the Lefti -- the IMPARTIAL OBSERVER OF THE NEWS) says a few of our Marines are being investigated for committing -- WAR CRIMES!!!!!

    We know this MO -- the two words will sweep the country like a movie publicity campaign, but in the end, we would not be surprised if there is no trial, and no war crimes; in the meantime, the HACKS get to masturbate again.

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