THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Can the hacks report on ANYTHING forthrightly? Let's go down the list: Show-biz? No, they're sponsors. Real estate? No, Real-TORS® are sponsors. Autos? No, auto dealers are sponsors. Sports? No, they're profit centers. (But they sure do put on quite an act pretending.) Liberals? No, they're right. Education? No, we send our kids to private schools. Crime? Ha! We live in gated suburban communities. Work? We prop our feet on a desk for a living. That leaves three things: government (on which we can always project our failings), conservatives and Republicans -- and they report on the last two not so much forthrightly as forthLEFTly. Thus it has been for decades, and thus it shall be for decades still.