THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
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I guess we're supposed to be impressed that 2 million attended. We can think of other once-powerful organizations that attracted huge crowds: the Know-Nothings, the Klan, the Socialists, the Prohibitionists. All went into history's dust bin. The GET-A-LIFE! Society will not join them soon, but its mob ignorance and general irrelevance guarantee it will in time.
And while we're at it, here's another reason the newspapers are headed down that path too: once a Mencken or a Royko would have seared the GET-A-LIFES! memorably. Now we slog through press releases. You can't go broke too soon, TRIBCO.
P. S. OKAY!!!!! says "'the market is oversaturated with horror,'" and sci-fi flicks are turning gloomy. The good news is they "'give you the chance to comment on the times you're living in,'" meaning with luck that JJJJJAAAAAHHHHHNNNNN-RUH will produce several dozen hugely successful INCONVENIENT TRUTHS.