Eugene David<br>...The One-Minute Pundit

Posted 3:15 PM by Gene

Thank God for little things:

At least Allen is now too old to kiss girls on screen: that is a relief.

P. S. We do suspect, however -- and we just tripped over this ourselves, twenty minutes after posting it -- that Stanley has been reviewing movies too long -- longer even than Woodster the Perv's been making CI-NE-MA:

Allen plays Splendini (aka Sid Waterman), an American magician appearing in London. For one of his tricks, a person's disappearance in a box, he asks a member of the audience to come onstage. At one performance, that person is a young American girl, Sondra, who is a college student aspiring to journalism. In that magic box she meets the spirit of a recently deceased London journalist who gives her a tip on a hot story.

I forgot to mention that previously we have seen a small ship bearing the newly dead into the Unknown, with Death at the helm. That journalist is aboard and is galled because he had a hot tip for a story that he now can't finish. He slips back to earth to pass the tip on to a reporter. Why he chooses this girl, and why Splendini then accompanies Sondra on her pursuit of the story, are only two of the oddities that this film asks us not to question.

We can answer these oddities quickly: 1. The girl is Scarlett Johansson (a hottie of the moment) and Splendini's THE SEX MACHINE (or rather the JEWISHY NEBBISHY SEX MACHINE); and 2. Splendini accompanies Sondra to prove to the world he can still DO IT.

Any more questions, Stan?

(Corrected at 5:10 p.m., no thanks to my own stupidity.)