Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Monday, October 02, 2006

    Posted 5:24 PM by Gene

    "I would drive a few miles for a hot stud like you, pant pant pant!" [Overemphasis added]

    Like how about into a DITCH?

    (Via -- alas -- NRO's Media Blog)

    P. S. In my never-to-be-published comic novel I have a character who talks like that -- only the character has a face that crosses Lynda Carter and Raquel Welch, has long raven hair, dimensions of, let's say, >44-24-36, and (as you may have gathered by now) is not a man. Any man who talks like this ought at least to have his head examined -- and possibly other parts of him.

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