Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

    AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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    Saturday, November 25, 2006

    Posted 11:48 AM by Gene

    We accidentally came across this scribble from an ad-blurbist in ROMY's favorite alternarag who's been at it for decades, who came of age watching the BISKINDIAN GENIUS of the sixties, and who scribblescribblescribbles hoping for a return to those golden days of yesteryear, and who scribblescribblescribbles because he imagines what a grand wri-TER he is, and after reading this effusive garbage we accidentally came across a hed on the home page that further capsulizes such brilliant writers, and their eternal tilting at the same bean-counter and stupid-teen movie windmills:

    Too dumb to quit

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