Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Thursday, December 21, 2006

Posted 10:30 AM by Gene

I wish I knew who Mr. Teachout's girlfriend is. She must be a writer or editor or some Ph.D. with a pop-culture kick, and when I surf About Last Night I hardly ever pay attention to her. Today she quotes from a movie ad-blurbist (a mem-BAH of the New Yooohk Fillum C-ri-TICS CUHcle) who, in 1,954 generous, genuinely sorrowful words tells us why CASABLANCA II -- disappoints. When a Ph.D. or whomever speaks of a cri-TIC's generous spirit we can be sure said typist creates vast gaseous verbally-freighted clouds of movie cri-TIC hot air, and is thus not worth reading. I absolutely detest the movie ad-blurbists because so many of them have this unquenchable desire to praise in the sewer depths, and they hold their noses and marvel at each new passing slop of raw waste as a masterwork, and then they compound the offense with their unending bulltripe, adding to the sewage. Really, Our Girl in Chicago should hang out with a better crowd (aside from Mr. Teachout, that is).

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