Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Posted 10:06 AM by Gene

Little Malcolm wastes more of His readers' time with another of His damfool LISTS. Yes, these bloggers will be forgotten in twenty years, but they're "famous" now, and this salt in the wound reminds me I've been at it for four years typing and no one reads me. This uses every last hype word in the show-biz flack's thesaurus. ("PHENOMENAL!!" "POPULAR!!" "HUGELY POPULAR!!" [SEVERAL TIMES!!] "HUGELY INFLUENTIAL!!" "HOT!!") And of course it's all the flatulent compromising horn-tooters we hear too much of every blasted day. (HARRY KNOWLES!!!!!) Why does Little Malcolm want to kiss all the world's behinds?

A NEUHARTHISM OF THE MONTH AWARD to DAVE!

P. S. A measure of how supremely contemptuous the Forbes.com staff is of its surfers: Every HOT!! blogger merits his own page -- so that if you want to use Recent Pages or Go Back to get to the article before you hit this PR screech, you have to leaf through 25 pages! MORONS.

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