Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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    • THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
    I know more than you.
    I make lots more money than you.
    I'm smarter than you.
    I'm sexier than you.
    I appear on TV all the time.
    I work ten minutes a day.
    I rule the universe.
    I'm going to live forever.
    You are an idiot.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
    A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
    I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
    --JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

    THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
    News isn't news when we don't report it.

    PERMALINKS:

    THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

    THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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    Saturday, January 27, 2007

    Posted 8:57 PM by Gene

    We must have been in QUITE A HURRY to put out that survey DEMANDING BUSH RESIGN or something because JonBoy has already put up the covers: ours a downer on BLACK HAWK DOWN and everyone else's dealing with a world space race. (I guess we wouldn't be interested, huh JonBoy?) Or maybe they're feeling the hot breath of THE TWXSTERS -- but WHY would they compete with a rag that's as skinny as though it's printed on onion-skin?

    And just how valuable IS a newsrag? Its top MEDIA WRITER (ugh) does a story on (ugh) MONEY HONEY® -- and it contains nothing you wouldn't have found elsewhere. Why do we need newsrags?

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