THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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Mr. Adams himself reported to four different bosses in less than three years. He was hired by then-CMO John Costello in early 2005, who was replaced by Home Depot veteran Tom Taylor, who then left 11 months later. And with his eventual promotion to CMO from interim head of marketing, Mr. Adams reported to CEO Bob Nardelli, who was then ousted three months later, replaced by Home Depot veteran Frank Blake.
Tenet No. 1. Change for change's sake. Have as many CEOs and executives in as short a time as possible. Constant change is good -- for ulcers, heart palpitations, etc.
"Why should they pay this guy a lot of money since they can't do a lot of marketing until they get the operations fixed?" asked David Gallagher, a recruiter at Boyden Global Executive Search. "I also wouldn't be surprised if they are in no hurry to replace him until they get close to fixing the operational problems."
Tenet No. 2. Schmoozing in Hollywood or lounging in that Super Bowl luxury box is FAR more important than treating the customer right -- if you know what a customer is.
OR:
Home Depot has inked an estimated $60 million in deals with Nascar, ESPN Game Day and the Olympics, and that's not counting the NFL pact put together by Mr. Adams -- estimated to be worth nearly $25 million -- according to IEG Sponsorship Report.
TRANSLATION: I WAS AT THE (FILL IN THE BLANK) AND YOU WEREN'T!!!!!