THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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But even if I wanted to write as an apologist for the unruly, radical, left-wing "base" of the Democratic Party, I would be a poor messenger for that apology. I have too much equity in my home, and appreciate too much both the medical discoveries and technological wonders that only entrepreneurship can produce. I wouldn't be a credible spokesman for any Lenin other than John. As a progressive son of the South, I also know what red clay looks like. And as far as I know, I was the only person to speak this year at the annual conventions of both the Democratic Leadership Council and the Yearly Kos--rendering me, I suppose, the only progressive ever to triangulate in his pajamas.