THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.
PERMALINKS:
THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY
THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY
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MPAA Admits Mistake on Downloading Study
There is not a damned thing Sammy Glickman and the Kingdom of the Eternal Valenti are right about. They're not right about the genius of fillum or the eeeeeeeeeeeevil of file sharing or their stupid box-office stats or how the public looooooooooooooooooves the ratings system or how Jack was a good man. Well, there is one thing they are right about: that Congresspoops are eminently flatterable and bribable, and for that reason we suspect President "Movie Star" McKeating will spend half his time in Sammy's screening room.