Posted 12:53 PM by Gene

If, as we fervently hope, the Os-©A®s' ratings tank -- highly unlikely; the automatic audience wants to see the ugly dresses -- it will occasion such wailing and gnashing of teeth as we haven't seen since...the STRIKE. SUPERNIKKI!!!!! will quote five insiders, and Mogul's Friend will mourn that Hollywood has lost its...SOUL. Of course one lousy batch of numbers won't change an industry as deeply set in its ways as your typical KKK cross-burning (as thus it resembles, though the Kluxers' sheets tend to be prettier), but in addition to all sorts of very public breast-beating may come covert ways to improve God's gift to man -- like maybe nominating some "DRECK" for best pic-tyure. This would seem impossible but the ad-blurbists can be very obliging; after all, they frequently fill in their names above the DRECK's titles. It may even occasion some remakes of classics, except that Rosie's Nephew already tried remaking Casablanca, and it didn't even get nominated for a Razzie. No, most probably the hacks of both kinds will merely say it's the PUBLIC's fault for not appreciating such greatness, as they always do, and barring an effusion of genius from another planet we shall see as many ad-blurbist-pleasing bores five years from now, or ten, or twenty -- unless the biz has so successfully chased its clientèle away as to finally go out of business, as it's often threatened.

By the way, SUPERNIK!!!!!, could it be the lack of "Triple-A presenters and performers" tonight mirrors the lack of Triple-A talent in the BUSINESS? And since you mention it we further hope Diablo (!) has the chance to repeat her performance tonight, which will send the whole American Society of Willfully Ignorant Advertisers contingent into such delirium they'll pay twice as much next year for a thirty -- not that anyone has to coach them. Ub Iger! Better get another couple of million ready!