Eugene David<br>...The One-Minute Pundit

Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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2/2/03 - 2/9/03

1/26/03 - 2/2/03

1/19/03 - 1/26/03

1/12/03 - 1/19/03

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

AMERICA'S MOST UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY WEB SITE!

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Saturday, March 08, 2008

Posted 4:08 PM by Gene

As the estate of Dr. Seuss prepares for another mammoth product placement and another huge increase in its worth, we thought we should excerpt from HSX.com's description of it:

The story builds on the theme that every person is important no matter how big or small.

Which is a fraud on the face of it because 1. In Hollywood little guys are aborted fetuses. 2. Guess-Who (and not HORTON) runs its distributor.

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