THE NEWS HACK'S CREED: I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2: A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3: I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.
THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4: News isn't news when we don't report it.
Eating today at my local lovable Mickey D's and remembering this pioneering TV commercial with THE JUGGLER'Spredecessor (the jingles were dorky even then -- notice too the Capitol "Hi-'Q'" music in the open, a relic from Hanna-Barbera; betcha they wouldn't do THAT no more), I remembered the boast Mick made on His Golden Arches -- "Over 500 Million Hamburgers Sold", whatever. But if you want a really outlandish number, total the Mick's sales for the last 25 years -- and then adjust them for inflation. We have no idea what it would be, but we'd guess it's over $1 TRILLION -- proof people are literally gluttons for punishment.
Odd that he's still around after eating all those delicious McDonald's hamburgers.