Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

THE NEWS HACKS' DICTIONARY

THE EUGENE DAVID GLOSSARY

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Saturday, April 12, 2008

Posted 8:07 PM by Gene

I finally heard -- the REMARKS our pundit superiors are in such a big foamy airy bubble about. The Messiah starts off all right, if restating the obvious: that much of the Rust Belt has seen little change in decades. Then instead of suggesting a solution He unaccountably goes into the kind of automatic pilot we'd expect of a God Who's done well for Himself, the distillation of what every limousine liberal has thought since the first Rolls, but it never occurs to Him it might be off the mark because He's never talked to an unadmiring crowd before, especially in the mirror, and natch this crowd praised the Lord too. I will not guess whether the remarks do anything good or bad -- this campaign's coverage has been nothing but guesses -- but I will say The Messiah may be one of the most inept public speakers this side of...DUBYA. And he doesn't even have the mitigating charm of non-sequiturs.

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