Eugene David
...The One-Minute Pundit

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THE NEWS HACK'S CREED:
I know more than you.
I make lots more money than you.
I'm smarter than you.
I'm sexier than you.
I appear on TV all the time.
I work ten minutes a day.
I rule the universe.
I'm going to live forever.
You are an idiot.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 2:
A lie isn't a lie when it tells THE TRUTH.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 3:
I've come to realize that the looseness of the journalistic life, the seeming laxity of the newsroom, is an illusion. Yes, there's informality and there's humor, but beneath the surface lies something deadly serious. It is a code. Sometimes the code is not even written down, but it is deeply believed in. And, when violated, it is enforced with tribal ferocity.
--JOHN "OMERTA" CARROLL.

THE NEWS HACK'S CREED, No. 4:
News isn't news when we don't report it.

PERMALINKS:

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Saturday, May 31, 2008

Posted 10:45 AM by Gene

All right, hacks, you win again. This whole episode demonstrates the overwhelming capacity of the press to have its way. We should note, however, that fluke hits have happened before, powered by monomaniacal think-alike squadrons of true believers; thus the teenage girls and Titanic; thus the born-agains and WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!!! The Jesus Slasher Movie. Both are now embarrassments. Moreover you don't go down seven percent in attendance year-to-year for nothing, and THE CONSPIRACY is excreting the same tentpoles and horror movies as before.

The only thing is now the 86,000 press agents at PEOPLE WARNER will top this with talk of sequels. Surely their enablers the idiot hacks are rubbing their hands and their wallets at the prospect of eliciting a new series on THE GREATEST TELEVISION NETWORK IN HISTORY. Isn't it enough to elect The Messiah? Can't you leave us alone for once?

(Via the table-pounding obsessive-compulsives at HSX. It provokes a cringe to remember this outfit's owned by Cantor Fitzgerald. Enough said.)

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